I Guess We Never Really Moved On
by heroic.love.story
Summary: 7 years ago, Edward left Bella without a goodbye. Now he's back and neither of them have fully moved on. Will their love be rekindled? All Human. M to be safe.
1. All Hail The Heartbreaker

**BPOV**

This was NOT happening. It couldn't really be him; he lived on the other side of the world. He moved. He left me. He left me 7 years ago. 7 years, 3 months and 6 days ago to be exact. It has to be him, just look at that hair. It's the exact same shade of bronze that it was 2654 days ago. He's supposed to be in Italy. Why is he in Seattle? He told me he was never coming back.

Maybe he won't even recognize me. It was 7 years ago, he probably doesn't remember me. I bet if you asked him the name of his first love, he would say the name of some Italian girl. He's probably married to an Italian model with whom he has beautiful, bronze haired children. I was not his first love. I was just his high school girlfriend; it meant nothing.

"Bella Swan?" called a name from the other side of the room. I thought I recognized the voice, but it figured it was just the doctor or nurse that would be putting up with me today.

I looked up to see where the voice was coming from. The world definitely hates me. It was a doctor, but of course, it was the doctor that I was hoping I would never see again. I tried to stand up, but I had to immediately sit back down. I was going to be sick. The only thing going through my mind at that moment was that _stupid_ song_._ The song that I listened to non stop for three months after he left. It had four thousand, six hundred and thirty seven plays by the end of that year. I wasn't going to let myself sing those words in my head. _I'm falling apart; I'm barely breathing; with a broken heart that's still beating._ Oh god, I can't breathe. _Breathe, Bella. _I have to get myself under control_._ I am not allowing myself to cry in public, and that is what will happen if I keep thinking of _that_ song. Remember why Alice told you not listen to that song.

_--Flashback—_

"_Stop listening to that stupid song, Bella! It's just going to make you more upset. He left me too, you know. He is my brother and he left without a single word. At least he had the decency to say goodbye to you." _

_I could see the tears in Alice's eyes as she yelled at me. Alice never cried._

"_He didn't say goodbye, Alice. He never told me he was leaving. We had plans to go to the movies and he just never showed up. I called him after an hour of waiting and asked him where he was. You wanna know what he told me?" I took a deep breath and tried to hold back the tears I could feel threatening to fall. _

"_He told me that he was on a plane. He said 'I'm sorry Bella, but it's for the best. I need to do what's best for me, and right now that's being in Italy.' He didn't say goodbye! You had him your entire life, I only got a year. It was exactly a week after our one year anniversary and he just LEFT." _

_I had never told anyone about the conversation I had with him._

"_Bella, oh... Bella I never knew. I just assumed... I mean... I thought he would have at least said goodbye to you." _

_She walked over to my bed where I was sitting and took me into her arms. We sat there for what felt like hours, both of us crying while she tried to comfort me._

"_He didn't say goodbye, Alice. Why didn't he say goodbye? He never really loved me. He didn't even care enough to tell me he was leaving."_

"_Shh, Bella. He loved you. Everyone saw how much he loved you."_

"_He didn't love me Alice; he didn't even say goodbye."_

_--End Flashback--_

Damnit, it's been 7 years. I shouldn't still care; I shouldn't still be hurt. He left me and never came back. Think of the song Alice played for you; the song that was made so you could forget about him. _I won't shed a single tear wishing that I had you here; I don't need a man to hold my hand; I'm stronger than you think I am. _

Ok, I can do this. One foot in front of the other; that's all I have to do. Who am I kidding myself? My knees are practically jelly.

I should have stayed in bed this morning.

**EPOV**

It couldn't be her. There was no way it could be her; it was just my mind playing tricks on me. I thought I had seen her countless times before. I thought I had seen her at the airport in Italy, the Starbucks down the street, the grocery store across town. No. It wasn't her. It was just someone that looked like her. I had convinced myself years ago that it wasn't her calling me in the middle of the night, saying nothing and then hanging up. There was no way she had my number there, and after the way I left things, she probably never wanted it either. There was no possible way she would have been in the Italy airport four years ago; she stayed in Forks. _Damnit, Cullen. Why did you take that scholarship? _I could have stayed with her. I _should_ have stayed with her.

_Snap out of it; it's not her._

"Dr. Cullen?" my thoughts were interrupted by one of the nurses, Jessica. It was required that all of the doctors knew the nurses by name; something about showing gratitude for all of their help.

"What do you need, Jessica?"

"Um, a patient just came in and she's not on your service, but we're backed up and could really use some help."

"Sure, just give me the chart. It's a pretty slow night for me. Visiting hours are almost over in the children's wing, so most of the parents have already asked their questions for the day."

"Thanks, Dr. Cullen. It shouldn't take you too much time, probably just a sprain or something. The girl came in with an ice pack on her wrist muttering something about the ground winning, but she'd get him next time. Have fun." she said with a laugh.

I looked down at the chart and my heart stopped. _This must be a mistake, some kind of cruel joke_. Suddenly all I could think of was stupid song. _Now it's over, it's over, it can't be over; I wish that I could take it back; but it's over_. I listened to that stupid song for three months after I left. From the day I left until the end of December that was the only song I heard. I would have kept listening to it, but my roommate got sick of it. He told me that if I didn't make it my new year's resolution to never listen to that song again, he would make sure I didn't have ears to listen to it with. He thought that it was pathetic of me to be 'pining' over a girl that _I _left. He was right about that. It _was_ all my fault. I didn't _have_ to leave. I can't keep doing this to myself. She moved on. She probably got together with Jacob Black after I left. I felt a growl come from somewhere deep inside me. _She better not be with him._

"Bella Swan?" I hadn't said that name in 7 years. Just _thinking_ of that name brought back all the memories of how I just left her.

When I first left, all the e-mails I received from Alice, Emmett, Rose and Jasper were about _her._ How depressed _she_ was, how _she_ never talked, and how _she _barely ever left her house. I know they were trying to get me to come home, but it just made things even harder. I wanted to go back. I wanted to go back _so _badly… but I couldn't. I left her. I hurt her more than I ever though possible. I couldn't just _go back_. I couldn't go back just thinking I could get her back after I hurt her. I wouldn't be able to live in Forks without being with her, and I knew I didn't deserve to have her back.

What they didn't know was that I was just as bad as she was, if not worse. After I got on the plane to leave, I knew I had made the biggest mistake of my life. I had thrown away the only woman I could ever love because I wanted to be a doctor. I was being stupid and selfish and I did what I thought was best for me and my career. I shouldn't have left her; especially without a real goodbye.

_--Flashback--_

"_I should be with her right now. I shouldn't be on this plane; I should be with Bella." I had called Emmett from the plane. I started freaking out and he was the only one I could talk to about this; he was the only one that knew I was leaving._

"_It's better this way, man. You would never be able to leave her if you saw her face."_

"_I shouldn't have left without saying goodbye… its bad enough that I'm standing her up on our date."_

"_Then why did you even agree to go? You knew you were leaving when she mentioned the movies."_

"_I couldn't let her know something was up. She would worry if I told her I was busy but wouldn't tell her what I had to do, or in this case, where I had to go."_

"_It'll all work out eventually. She'll understand that this is what's best for your career."_

"_What the hell are you talking about? She'll never forgive me. I'll never forgive myself." I was getting ready to yell at Emmett for what he said when I was interrupted by a beep on my phone, letting me know that I had another call._

"_Damnit, I'm getting another call. It's probably her; I should have been there an hour ago. I'll call you when I land."_

"_Good luck man. Have a safe flight." I heard him hang up, so I took a deep breath and clicked the talk button to go to the other call. "Hello?"_

"_Edward, where are you? You were supposed to meet me here an hour ago." I knew it would be her. At least she didn't sound mad… yet._

"_I'm... on a plane."_

"_What?! Why... where are you going? Why didn't you-"_

"_Bella, calm down. I'm going to Italy."_

"_But… why? For how long? You're coming back, right?"_

"_No, Bella, I'm not."_

"_Seriously Edward, stop kidding around. Where are you?"_

"_I'm not kidding, I'm on a plane. I got a scholarship offer from a top university in Italy and I couldn't turn it down. It's going to be the best thing for my career."_

"_But… you can't just… I'll come with you. I can be on the next plane out to Italy."_

"_No Bella, you can't. I need to do this on my own... I'm sorry Bella, but it's for the best. I need to do what's best for me, and right now that's being in Italy. It's best for you too, Bella; I'm not right for you."_

"_No! There is no where I'd rather be than with you. Unless…" I heard her faint sobs on the other end "… you don't want me anymore, do you?" Hearing her say those words broke my heart; I could never not want her._

"_No Bella, I don't. You should move on. You deserve better than this." I could now hear her crying on the other end, no longer trying to stop me from hearing it. "Goodbye, Bella. I'll never put you through anything like this again, I can promise you that. Go on with your life. It will be as if I never existed."_

_--End Flashback--_

After what felt like hours, I watched her finally make her way over towards me and my heart started pounding in my chest.For the last 7 years, I thought about seeing her again. I went over every line and every apology I could say, but whenever I tried to contact her to tell her how sorry I was, I stopped myself. _I don't deserve her forgiveness._ I took a deep breath and tried to calm myself down. _She needs your help._ I told myself. _You're the doctor; she's the patient. Get over your issues and help her!_

I should have stayed in bed this morning.

* * *

**AN: This is my first story. I'm more of a reader than a writer but I thought of this so I decided to see how it worked out.**


	2. Broken

**BPOV**

After what felt like hours, I finally made my way over to him. I was standing less than a foot away from him and my heart was making sure I knew it.

"Bella Swan?" He asked again. I couldn't even say his name in my head. I didn't trust my voice, so I just nodded my head.

"I'm Dr. Cullen, follow me please." _It's definitely him._

He started to lead me down the hallway and into an exam room. How could he be so calm about this? My previous thoughts were obviously right; he didn't even remember me. I had spent months crying over this _ass_ and he didn't even know who I was anymore.

"So, Ms. Swan, what exactly hurts and what happened to cause the pain?" At least if any of the tears escaped I could blame it on the pain.

"I was walking out to my truck this morning and when I went to unlock the door, the key got stuck. It was a little frozen so I was going to walk over to the passenger side door. I took one step and fell on my wrist. I probably just sprained it a little, but I figured I better come here just in case." _And now I'm wishing I hadn't. _"It hurts quite a bit, but only when I move it."

"Ah, Bella. You always were a clumsy girl." He said as his smile turned into a stone cold glare.

So he does remember me. Damnit, this doesn't make things any easier. He cleared his throat, which I assumed was to cover up what he just said.

"Let's get you through to x-rays, Ms. Swan. It could just be a small fracture, but I don't want to you to leave here until we know for sure. I'll take you down now and one of the nurses can explain to you what we will be doing."

"Save the nurses some time and energy. I've been to the hospital more times than I can remember, so I could _give_ that speech to someone. And please, call me Bella."

"Alright, Bella. A nurse will be right in with a gown for you to change into, and I will be back in a few minutes."

He quickly left the room, slamming the door on his way out. _He must really hate me._

**EPOV**

I had to get out of there. She was a whole new person, yet still the same girl I fell in love with. I stood with against the wall, slowly banging my head against it.

"That patient giving you that much trouble?" Jessica laughed as she walked by.

"Yeah, you could say that."

I headed into the staff washroom to splash some cold water on my face. I needed to get a hold of myself. There she was, calm as could be, and I'm here freaking out. I rested my head on the faucet for a minute while my hands gripped the sides. _Get a grip, Cullen. _I had to go back eventually, but right now I didn't know if I should go back later rather than sooner. I looked in the mirror one last time and finally made my way back to her.

**X X X X X**

I finally got her through x-rays after what felt like a century. With it being winter time, there were many people in the ER with broken bones due to the ice all over the sidewalks. Bella's wrist ended up being broken in two different places. An hour later she was sitting on an exam room table with her arm in a blue cast.

"You'll have to remain in the cast for 6-8 weeks. We can schedule an appointment for you in about three weeks just to have it checked on. If it's healing well after week 5, we can set a date to get the cast removed. Do you have any questions before you leave?"

"Only one…" She paused for a minute, as if she was wondering whether she should continue or not. "Why did you leave me? When you left 7 years ago, you hurt me more than I ever though I possible. The love of my _life_ just left without even saying goodbye. I cried every night for three months. Every night, Edward. Why? That's all I need to know. Why did you do it?"

I could see the tears welling up in her eyes. _Damnit, I was not expecting that._

"Bella… I… I thought it was for the best. I was… I don't even know…"

"No... You know what, don't finish that sentence. I don't want to know." She wiped the tears that started falling with her sleeve. "Thank you for your help, Dr. Cullen. I will call the hospital sometime this week to make an appointment for a check up." With that, she got up and left, taking whatever was left of my heart with her.

I should have said something. I spent hours going over what this conversation would be like; what I would say to her when I finally saw her again. My mind was blank. How could I let her down like that? How could I be so stupid and selfish?

**BPOV**

_He must really hate me. _I thought to myself after he slammed the door. _ I didn't even do anything to him!_ Now I was getting mad. He was my first love; my only love. I gave him everything and now he hated me. He hated me for loving him. I could feel the tears threatening to escape my eyes.

_No, Bella. Do not cry. The nurse is going to be in here soon. Do not let yourself cry over him again._

**X X X X X**

An hour later, I was sitting back in my regular clothes with a blue cast on my left wrist. Just perfect, a broken wrist.

"You'll have to remain in the cast for 6-8 weeks. We can schedule an appointment for you in about three weeks just to have it checked on. If it's healing well after week 5, we can set a date to get the cast removed. Do you have any questions before you leave?" _Great, another visit to see him._

"Only one…" _I know I'm going to regret asking this… why even bother?_ "Why did you leave me? When you left 7 years ago, you hurt me more than I ever though I possible. The love of my _life_ just left without even saying goodbye. I cried every night for three months. Every night, Edward. Why? That's all I need to know. Why did you do it?"

_Hold yourself together Bella; do not let yourself cry._

"Bella… I… I thought it was for the best. I was… I don't even know…"

"No... You know what, don't finish that sentence. I don't want to know." I wiped the tears away from my face with my sleeve before he could notice them. "Thank you for your help, Dr. Cullen. I will call the hospital sometime this week to make an appointment for a check up."

I had to get out of there. My feet were moving themselves and before I knew it I was out the main doors and sitting in my car.

"_Damnit._" I muttered to myself.

I spent the last 7 years trying to _forget_ him. After all this time, I was finally convinced I was over it. _Not even close to over it. _I was fooling myself to think I could ever really be _over it._

I'm such an idiot. I never should have asked him that. _Stupid, stupid Bella._

I needed to get out of this parking lot. I needed to be as far away from Edward Cullen as possible. I needed a drink. A heavy, heavy, make-you-forget-your-problems kind of drink. I needed to call Alice.

**EPOV**

The rest of the day seemed to go by at a painfully slow rate. By the time I finished my shift at the hospital, the only thing I could think of was how much I needed a drink. I decided to call Emmett to see if he was doing anything, or if he at least knew the name of a place I could go.

"Hey, Edward. Long time no talk."

"I talked to you last night, Emmett. I've only been back for two weeks, I'm still getting used to my new job."

"And how is your new job? Any interesting cases today?"

"Are you ok, Emmett? You don't sound like... yourself." I knew Emmett had always been weird, but he seemed have gotten even weirder while I was in Italy.

"Oh, I'm fine. Just peachy. No cases that stood out today, none at all? Like… nobeautifulwomenwhohappentobetheloveofyourlife?"

"Woah, slow down. What about Bella?"

"HA! So you did see Bella today." _Busted. _

"And by the tone of your voice, I'm guessing that you had something to do with that?"

"Well it's not like I pushed her down or anything, but she _may_ have called me when she fell and I _may_ have told her to go to the hospital that you just _happened_ to be working at. I forgot you got a job there, honestly." I could practically hear him smirking over the phone.

"That's actually what I'm calling to talk to you about… kind of. I need a drink and since I haven't been back here since before I was legally allowed to drink, I need you to tell me some good places to go."

"Well, Rose and I are going out to a club tonight so you could come along with us. I'm sure she wouldn't mind. I mean, you did break her best friend's heart… but she probably misses you anyways."

"Thanks for that, Emmett. So what time should I be to your place at?"

"Rosie and I are leaving at 8, so stop by at around 7:30? It's only 6 now, so that gives you a chance to grab something to eat and then once you get here you know Rose will want to hear all about Italy."

"Sounds great. Thanks, Emmett. I don't know what I would do without you."

"I used to think the same about you… but then I actually didn't have you around so I know what I do when you're not around."

"You're not gonna let this go, are you?"

"You can't just leave and then waltz back 7 years later hoping everyone would forget it. Trust me Eddie, it's hard to get rid of your past."

"So I've learned. Anyways, I'll see you later. Thanks again for letting me crash your date with Rose."

"Oh, don't worry my darling brother. You're not crashing anything."

For some reason, he made me feel like it wasn't just going to be the three of us.

* * *

**AN: So there is the second chapter. I'm going to try to have a new chapter each day but it will all depend on how motivated I am to finish writing... I'm a huge procrastinator.**


	3. It's Not Over

**BPOV**

Before I had even left the parking lot, I had called Alice to discuss plans for tonight.

"Bell-laaaaa! What's up?"

"I need a drink. I had the worst day _ever. _Not only do I have to stay in a cast for 6-8 weeks, but I saw your darling brother today."

"Oh gosh, what did Emmett do this time?"

"Not Emmett. You've got one more guess."

"But Emmett is… OH MY GOD! Edward?! You saw _Edward?_ Where? He's in Italy…you're not in Italy...are you? Bella I know you almost ran away to Italy before… tell me you are NOT in Italy."

"Calm down Alice, I'm not in Italy. I'm in my car, driving away from Seattle Grace Hospital. Which explains the cast and the cast explains seeing your brother. Are you doing anything tonight? I need to go drinking."

"Jasper and I are supposed to meet Rose and Emmett at some club, but I'm sure they wouldn't mind you tagging along. Jasper is working late tonight so you can stop by anytime. I ordered Chinese food!"

"I'm just gonna swing by home and change, then I'll be to your place around 7."

"Sounds great!" Why was she always so cheerful? I think I could hear her grinning over the phone.

"Ok Alice, I'll see you at 7."

**X X X X X**

An hour later, I was showered, changed and sitting in my car outside of Alice's house. Well, Jasper and Alice's house more specifically. Both Jasper and Alice and Rose and Emmett had gotten married after college. They all grew up together, so it was really no surprise that they were high school sweethearts. _Like Edward and I should have been._

I had to stop thinking of _him_; the whole point of going out and getting drunk was to forget about him. I looked hot tonight, and I wasn't going to waste the night thinking about him. For the first time in a long time I actually took time to look good. I was wearing a blue satin dress that barely covered my ass and showed off all the right parts of my body. For once, I was thankful for Alice forcing me to buy something. At the time I only agreed to get her to shut her up, but now I was glad that she persuaded me.

I made my way up to the door and before I even knocked my favourite little pixie was pulling me into a hug. She was wearing a short strapless dress that was yellow with white elastic trimming that showed off her petite body perfectly.

"Geeze Alice, for such a small person you sure have a lot of energy."

"I'm just so excited! Edward's back and I haven't seen him in years!"

"I wish I could say the same."

"I take it your meeting wasn't friendly? Is he the reason you have this cast? Bella… did you punch my brother?!"

"No Alice, I did not punch your brother. As much as I may have wanted to, I didn't. I slipped on some ice this morning and I couldn't move my wrist, so I called Emmett to come and help me but he told me that he was at work so to just go to Seattle Grace. I don't know why, but he _insisted_ I go there… something about thanking him later? You know Emmett, he can be so…weird sometimes. Anyways, so I get to the hospital and I kept thinking I was seeing him but I just assumed that it was my imagination or something."

"Him being Edward? Come on Bella, you can say his name."

"Uh yeah... Edward." All of my insides were shaking as I said his name, and they continued to as I told Alice about my day.

"So he didn't say _anything_ about why he left? Oh, when I get a hold of him I swear he will..."

"Alice, calm down. It's ok. I'm okay. I'll be okay after drinking at least. So we need to leave. Soon."

"Jasper should be home any second now and then we can head out." I swear that girl can see the future, because right as she finished her sentence I heard the front door open.

"Honey, I'm home!"

"Jasper!" she greeted him with a kiss on the cheek and I had to turn away. I should be fine with it after all these years, but seeing couples together makes me feel sick. "Bella's coming with us tonight!"

"Hey Bella, that's great. You never seem to get out much."

"Gee, thanks. I hope you don't mind me crashing your night though."

"No worries Bella, you know you're like a sister to all of us. I'm sure Rose and Emmett wont mind."

"Come on guys, let's go! Hey Jas honey, can you be our designated driver for the night? Bella here needs to get drunk and we don't want her making a fool out of herself all by herself now do we?" She gave him the sweetest smile to make him give it, but it's not like she needed to. He would give her the world if she asked for it.

"Sure, I wasn't planning on drinking much anyways. Emmett called me on my way home and he said he has a surprise for us."

"Thanks Jasper!" she gave him a quick kiss on the cheek before going on about Emmett's surprise "I wonder what the surprise could be. Do you think Rose is finally pregnant?! Those two have been married longer than us!"

"Calm down Alice, we'll find out when we get there. Come on, let's head out." Jasper was one of the few people who could calm her out of one of her excitement spasms. Those two were definitely soul mates.

**X X X X X**

Half an hour and one very _loud_ car ride later, we arrived at Breeze, a new club in town. Alice told me in the car that there was karaoke, and I was afraid that after a few strong drinks I would end up on stage.

When we got inside, we quickly found Rose and Emmett sitting at a table on the upper level over looking the dance floor. Rose was wearing a stunning red halter dress with a low v neck. She looked gorgeous, but she didn't need the dress for that.

Before we had even sat down, Alice was already asking about the surprise.

"Emmy you know you want to tell meeee!" Emmett was definitely going to lose this battle. No one ever resisted Alice's puppy dog eyes, so when it was paired with her innocent voice he didn't stand a chance.

"Aw Alice, don't pull that on me, you know I can't resist it."

"Thanks kind of the point Emmy, pleaseeee?"

"You'll find out in a few minutes, I promise!"

"This better be a good surprise."

"Oh trust me little sister, it is." The grin on Emmett's face was one that I had never seen on him before. It made me a little worried but it seemed to make Alice even more excited, which was something I didn't think possible at the moment.

The surprise must have been behind me, because Alice was sitting across from me and all of a sudden she started screaming. She got up faster than I'd ever seen and she was behind me before I could even turn around to see what was going on. When I finally did turn around, there was only one thing going through my mind. _I'm going to kill Emmett._

Standing behind me was none other than Edward Cullen.

Rose must have seen my face go a ghastly white because she was suddenly beside me, reminding me to breathe. I couldn't move. I felt like everything around me was going so fast, but so slow at the same time. I could still hear the shrieks of Alice behind me, but everything else was blurred together. My mind was suddenly filled with images of when Edward was still here, when we were together and happy.

"Bella, Breathe." I felt Rose put her arm around my shoulder and I was snapped back into reality.

"Bella, are you alright?" It was Emmett this time. _I am going to kill him._

The only thing my body would allow me to do was grab the drink that was in front of me. I chugged it down, got up and went back to the bar for another.

**EPOV**

"Emmett. A word."

"I swear little brother, I had no clue she was coming! Alice, tell Edward I had no clue she was coming!"

"Emmett had no clue she was coming. She called me on her way home after seeing _you_ and needed a drink. So since we were all meeting tonight, I told her she could come. I didn't know that you were coming."

"Why are you here anyways? You moved to Italy."

"I wanted to come, Alice. I missed you guys."

"Even Bella?"

"What about me?"

**BPOV**

"What about me?" I came back from the bar to hear Alice asking Edward something about me.

"Bella! You're back. What did you get?"

"A Broken Heart Zombie Mai Tai."

"What is it? And why do you have two?"

"I don't know exactly, but the bartender said it's strong. The second is for when the first one is empty."

"Are you sure you should be drinking such a strong drink? You're not much of a drinker."

"Yeah Bella, you're gonna feel it in the morning."

"Thanks for the warning, but I think I know what I'm getting myself into."

**BPOV**

I really didn't care how I would be feeling in the morning. I needed to forget about my day, and I needed to forget it now. It stung as it went down my throat, but by the time I had finished off the first glass I could already start to feel the effects of it.

"Bella, you might want to slow down a little."

"Maybe Jaspers right. You should do karaoke Bella! You're an amazing singer."

"Use your puppy dog face Alice, she can't resist that."

"You're not helping, Rose. Fine Alice, I will do karaoke."

"Wow, she must really be drunk."

"Shush Emmett, before I change my mind."

"Come on Bella!" Before I had even put my drink down, Alice was grabbing my arm and pulling me towards the front of the room where the DJ was. "You need to pick a song!"

**EPOV**

A few minutes later, Alice came back without Bella.

"What song is she singing?" I was glad that it sometimes felt like my family knew what I was thinking. When Emmett asked, it was fine but if it was me who was asking they would all think I was obsessed with her. _Or maybe just finally figure out that I was still in love with her._

"Just wait and see, it's a surprise." She was talking to Emmett, but she was looking directly at me while she reached for Bella's drink.

She took a sip of it and immediately choked. "Oh god, what is in that? We need to get Bella a new drink before she comes back."

The music suddenly stopped and the DJ coughed into the microphone to get everyone's attention.

"It's karaoke night here at Breeze and we have our first singer, Ms. Bella Swan."

The crowd started applauding as she started walking from behind the stage. I heart a few catcalls and wolf whistles from men and I felt an emotion that I hadn't felt in a long time. _Jealousy._

As the song started, I started to choke on my own breath. I immediately knew the song and band as she started off into the song.

_It's a shame that it had to be this way  
It's not enough to say I'm sorry  
It's not enough to say I'm sorry  
_

_  
Maybe I'm to blame  
Or maybe were the same  
But either way I can't breathe  
Either way I can't breathe  
_

_  
All I had to say is goodbye  
Were better off this way  
Were better off this way_

Couples were starting to get up and dance to the song, but I couldn't move. It's not like I had anyone to dance to it with, and the only person that I would _want_ to dance with was on the stage. I could barely hear what she was saying, but I knew those lyrics by heart. The only thing I could see was her up on the stage. The rest of the room was all a blur, and it would have stayed a blur if Alice hadn't started shaking my shoulders.

"Edward? Are you ok?" She was talking to me like I was a five year old.

"I'm fine Alice." I reached for the closest drink on the table, which happened to be Bella's Broken Heart Zombie Mai Tai, and finished off the rest of it.

"You better get her another one before you come back, unless of course you feel like explaining to her why it's gone." As Bella went on singing, I could once again no longer hear Alice.

_I'm alive but I'm losing all my drive  
Cause everything were been through  
And everything about you  
Seemed to be a lie  
A guiltless twisted lie  
It made me learn to hate you  
Or hate myself for letting it pass by_

I could see her staring right at me. I needed to get out of this place. Why did I have to ride with Emmett?

"I'm going to get Bella a new drink." I could see Alice's lips moving as I turned away, but I still couldn't hear anything other than Bella's singing.

**X X X X X**

I knew I was taking longer than necessary to get back to the table with Bella's new drink. I couldn't go back and sit at the same table as her and act as if nothing happened. She did an encore song, which I was glad about seeing as it gave me more time to get back with her drink, but the song that she chose was even worse than the first one. I could see some blonde girl sitting beside me at the bar, and I could see her lips moving and her eyes looking me over, but the only thing I could hear was Bella.

All I could hear were the lyrics to the song that I hadn't heard in 7 years. The song that I listened to _over and over_ for three months after I left.

_My tears run down like razorblades  
And no, I'm not the one to blame  
It's you ' or is it me? _

_  
And all the words we never say  
Come out and now we're all ashamed  
And there's no sense in playing games  
When you've done all you can do_

I had to get out of here. I knew it was rude to leave the blonde when she was clearly talking to me, but I wasn't interested anyways. I grabbed the Broken Heart Zombie Mai Tai that I had ordered for Bella and walked to the nearest exit. I chugged back the entire glass and just stood with my head against the wall. I could still hear her singing from outside, and I knew that the song would soon be ending and I would have to be back with her Broken Heart Zombie Mai Tai.

I quickly went back to the bar and ordered two more Broken Heart Zombie Mai Tais (one for Bella and another for myself) and finally made my way back to the table just as Bella was walking off the stage.

"What took you so long, Edward? You're lucky Bella didn't come back and find out you drank all of her drink."

"I got her another one, Alice. I just needed to use the washroom."

"Yeah, I'm sure that's where you went."

At this point, I really didn't care if Alice believed me or not. I just wanted to drink.

**BPOV**

While I was singing on stage, I kept my eyes on Edward. I saw him looking back at me a few times, but for most of both songs he had left the table and was either at the bar or somewhere that I couldn't see him.

I took longer than necessary getting back to the table. I didn't want to have to face going back to Edward, knowing that he would know those songs were about him. Everyone at our table would have known those songs were about him. The only thing that made me want to go back was the fact that I had a nice, strong Broken Heart Zombie Mai Tai waiting for me when I got back. I knew that I was going to regret it in the morning, but right now I really didn't care.

When I got back to the table, my friends were all clapping and telling me what I good job I had done. I didn't really care though, because the one person that mattered most was sitting there, not saying anything. He wouldn't even _look_ at me.

After taking (a much too large) sip of my drink, I pulled Alice and Rose onto the dance floor.

"Come on girls, we have some dancing to do."

* * *

**AN: Links to dresses will be on my profile shortly. I'm lacking motivation/inspiration to finish Chapter 4 but I'm hoping to find some before tomorrow.**


	4. Low

**EPOV**

"Do you think we should take them home now? All three of them are drunk out of their minds."

"We never should have let them drink so much. How are we supposed to get all three of them home? Usually Bella is sober enough to help us."

Jasper, Emmett and I were sitting at out table watching Rose, Alice and Bella on the dance floor. All three of them were drunk out of their minds, and I wasn't much better off."

"We need to get Edward home too. Whose place is he going to crash at tonight?"

"I'd say at yours and Alice's, if that's ok. His car is at my place but Rose gets a little... friendly when she's drunk so he might not want to be anywhere near the place."

"Enough said right there, that's my sister you're talking about. Ok, I'll take him home. Though I'm not sure how he's going to like having to spend a half house car ride with Bella."

"I will be perfectly fine, Jazzy boy."

"Woah, you really had a lot to drink. You haven't called my Jazzy boy in ages."

"I couldn't call you Jazzy boy 'cause I left. I was an idiot and I left you and Alice and Rose and Emmett. And Bella. I left my beautiful Bella here all alone."

"You were an idiot, I'll give you that."

"Oh shush your mouth, Emmett. You went along with it. You knew I was leaving and you didn't try to stop me."

"You KNEW he was leaving?" Even though I was drunk, I knew this was gonna be bad.

**BPOV**

"APPLE BOTTOM JEANS... BOOTS WITH THE FUR"

"THE WHOLE CLUB WAS LOOKIN' AT HER..."

"SHE HIT THE FLOOR...NEXT THING YOU KNOW..."

"SHAWTY GOT LOW LOW LOW LOW LOW LOW LOW!"

I wasn't sure how long Rose, Alice and I had been dancing but I knew that I was ready to pass out. We were taking turns belting out the lyrics to Flo Rida's 'Low' while dancing.

When the song finally ended, I tried to get Rose and Alice to come back to the table with me but they insisted on dancing longer. I made my way back to the table and before any of the guys noticed me, I stopped to hear what they were saying.

"You were an idiot, I'll give you that."

"Oh shush your mouth, Emmett. You went along with it. You knew I was leaving and you didn't try to stop me."

"You KNEW he was leaving?" He couldn't be telling the truth. Emmett wouldn't do that... he knew how much I loved Edward.

"Bella, I couldn't have stopped him if I tried. He had his heart set on leaving and no one could have changed that."

"HOW COULD YOU NOT TELL ME EMMETT?"

"I made a promise to him Bella! I promised him that I wouldn't!" I guess Rose and Alice saw us arguing, because soon they were right next to Emmett and I.

"Why are you two fighting? BE HAPPY BELLA!"

"I can't be happy! Your idiot of a boyfriend sent mine away!"

"Bella what are you talking about, you haven't had a boyfriend since Edward!" She looked around the table to Edward, and then came closer to me and whispered loudly in my hear "He wasn't supposed to know that, was he?"

"No Rosie Posey, I don't think I was." Why was Edward acting so funny? "I'm glad to know. It makes me happy to know I wasn't the only miserable one while I was gone."

"I think it's about time we got you all home. Edward's becoming a little too truthful and we're all going to regret it in the morning if we don't get him to bed."

"No Jasper, I don't wanna leave!" Was Alice begging?

"Come on Rose, you need to get some sleep."

"Did I ever tell you how shexy you are? You're like a big teddy bear but a lion too! Wait...no that doesn't make any sense!" Rose started giggling as Emmett tried to help her out of her seat and towards the exit.

"Emmett Cullen get back here! I need to talk to you about… something. And I don't remember what that something is at the moment but I know that I'm mad!"

"Edward, can you help Bella to the car? You're the next most-sober even if you are drunk."

"I don't need _his_ help Jasper; I can get to the car on my own." I started walking away from Jasper but my foot got stuck on something and I fell down, landing on my broken arm. "DAMNIT!"

As I was trying to stand up, Edward started stumbling towards me. Since neither of us were 100 _ourselves_ at the moment, we ended up colliding into each other and my broken arm was pinned underneath his body.

"EDWARD!" Somebody shrieked. I was too drunk to recognize the voice so I just assumed it was Alice. "GET OFF BELLA RIGHT NOW, YOU'RE HURTING HER!"

"Calm down Alice, I was trying to be nice." He got up and slowly pulled me up by my hands to help me up. "At least we are wearing clothes this time while in that position." His voice was flat and dripping with sarcasm and I was mortified.

"This time?" Alice turned to me and raised her eyebrow "What does he mean by _this time_?"

"Come on Alice, we need to get you home." I gave Jasper a wear smile as he lead Alice out the door. I was hoping that if my friends remembered anything tomorrow morning, it would not be that.

"Bella, wait here. I'll go put Rose in the car and then come back and help you."

"I'm fine, Emmett." I started walking towards the door to prove that I was fine. "I don't need anyone to help me just 'cause I'm a little--" Before I could finish proving my point, I walked into the door frame instead of walking out the door. "WHO PUT THAT THERE?!"

I stood still for a few minutes while trying to get my ears to stop ringing. Before I knew what was happened I was being led out the door and I started to feel sick to my stomach. I stopped right where I was standing to look around me and see who was leading me to Jasper's car. _Edward._ I took a deep breath through my nose and all at once the scent that I hadn't wanted to smell in years filled my nose. _Edward._ He still had the same cologne that he always had.

Before I could stop whatever was coming up, I threw up all over his shoes.

**X X X X X**

I was awoken by an abrupt stop and I didn't know what was going on.

"Wake up guys, we're back." I think it was Jasper talking, but my ears were ringing so it was hard to tell. "Edward, help Bella into the guest room. Just follow me when I take Alice, its right down the hall from our room. You can crash in the room across the hall from the guest room Bella will be in."

"I told you before Jasper, I'm _fine._ I don't need anyone's help." I didn't care if I would wake up with bruises all of my body from stumbling all over the place; I did _not_ want help from _Edward._

"Last time you said that you tripped over your own feet and walked into the doorway. Just let him help you, Bella."

"No. I trip over stuff when I'm not drunk so I'll be fine." I slowly got out of the car to show them that I was fine. I was half way out of the car when my foot got caught and I started falling. I closed my eyes, waiting for my face to meet the ground but it never did.

I felt two hands under my arms pull me up from my near face-destroying fall. I was about to put my feet down on the ground when I was suddenly mid-air and over someone's shoulder.

"WHERE DID THE GROUND GO?! MY FEET BELONG ON THE GROUND!"

"S'okay Bella, I'm just taking you inside."

"PUT ME DOWN!"

"Bella! Be quiet before you wakeup Alice." I looked around me to see Jasper carrying a sleeping Alice in his arms which let me know that I was over Edward's shoulder.

I started swinging my arms and legs trying to get him to let me down but it didn't seem to be working. By the time we were inside Alice's house I could feel the tears in my eyes. _Damn alcohol._

I was placed gently onto a bed and by now the tears were falling freely.

**EPOV**

I knew that trying to quiet her down would do no good, especially with all the alcohol in her. I didn't have nearly as much as her so the effects on me were slowly wearing off.

When I placed her on the bed I saw tears falling down her face. It killed me to know that just my _presence_ hurt her so much. I sat down beside her on the bed and she seemed to be asleep. I wiped the tears from her eyes with my hand and then got up to leave.

Just as I was at the door, I heard her quiet voice. At first I thought she was talking in her sleep like she did so many times at those sleepovers with 'Alice'. I looked back at her and saw her looking back at me, with even more tears falling.

"Please don't leave me… just stay with me tonight. I don't want you to leave again."

I walked over to her and slowly climbed into the bed, taking time to make sure that she was ok with this. As soon as I was lying beside her, she threw her arms around my waist and buried her face into my shirt. I could feel her tears soaking through my shirt, but all I could do was hold her as she cried herself to sleep.

* * *

**AN: I've never been drunk so I didn't really know how to show them being drunk.. I hope it wasn't too bad x**


	5. For the Nights I Can't Remember

**BPOV**

I woke up and had no clue where I was. I looked around trying to figure out where I was and I cam across an alarm clock. 2:53. AM or PM? My head was killing me. After a few seconds of looking around the room, I realized I was in Alice's guest room. I went to get up to find some aspirin for my head, but I couldn't move. I turned around in bed to see Edward lying next to me. _What the hell? _I looked down at myself, pleased to find out I was still fully clothed. _Why am I in bed with Edward?_

I tried to remember what happened last night, but all that came to me was dancing and drinking. I need to talk to Alice… maybe she knows what happened last night.

I attempted to move his arm away from my waist without waking him, but as soon as I touched his arm I saw his eyes flutter open. He blinked a few times, looked around the room, and finally settled his eyes on mine.

"Hi."

"I'm uh… sorry for waking you. I was trying to get out of bed but your arm was blocking me… so if you could please move it… I need to leave."

"No."

"Edward, please. I really need to go." I could feel the tears welling up in my eyes and I needed to get out of there before they started falling.

"We need to talk, Bella." I could barely even _look_ at him, how was I supposed to talk to him?

"No, Edward, I can't. Please… just let me leave."

"I know this is hard for you Bella, seeing me again. It's hard for me too, and I know that it's all my fault… but I can't be here and not be able to even _talk_ to you. Every time I see you I want to hold you in my arms and kiss you, but I can't. I can live with not kissing you Bella, but I can't be here and not even be able to talk to you."

"Edward, just let me go. You left me. You chose not to be with me anymore. You told me that you didn't want me anymore and it hurt me more than anything ever has. Please, stop hurting me over and over again. Just let me go."

"I know that I left you… and I know that it was the stupidest thing I could have ever done. I know it doesn't change things, but you have _no idea_ how sorry I am for doing that."

"I can't, Edward." I was trying to stay strong, but my words were coming out as a whisper. "Just let me go."

I heard a faint knock on the door and used it as an opportunity to get away from Edward. "Who is it?"

"It's me, Bella." I don't think I had ever been so pleased to hear my best friend's voice.

"Just a second Alice, I'm just getting out of bed." I turned to Edward so I could finally get out of here "Please Edward," I whispered, "I need to talk to Alice."

He sighed as he got out of bed and I quickly made my way to the door before he could change his mind.

"Hey Bella, you don't know where Edward is do you? Jasper said he was staying in the other spare room but when I went in there it was-" She stopped speaking as Edward opened the door and walked out into the hall.

"I'm right here, Alice. Thank you for letting me crash here, but I need to be getting back to my apartment. Goodbye, Alice." He turned to me and his eyes were full of sadness "Goodbye, Bella." He looked over at Alice and then back to me and mouthed "I'm Sorry"

I turned back into the guest room and went to sit on the bed, knowing that Alice would follow to get the full story from me.

"It's not what you think, Alice. I woke up this morning, fully clothed may I add before you let your mind wander, and he was there. I tried to get out of there before he woke up but he had his arm wrapped around me like I was about to fall off a building. He refused let me go until you came because he wanted to talk."

"Well what did you guys talk about?"

"Nothing. I couldn't, Alice. Not yet." My voice was starting to crack and I felt a single tear fall down my cheek. "I still love him."

Alice moved closer and pulled me into a hug. "Shh, it's ok Bella."

"I shouldn't love him. He left me. He doesn't love me and he never did."

"Of course he loves you Bella. He always has and nothing will ever change that."

I started to feel major déjà vu. I had been in this situation before. I had had the same conversation with Alice more times than I could count.

"You know what you need Bella?" I wiped my eyes with the back of my hand and looked up at Alice with a questioning glance. "A girl's night in."

"No Alice, I'm fine. Really, I am. You know that's not my kind of stuff. Besides, I feel like an elephant is walking on my head so I wouldn't be much fun anyways."

"Fine, no girl's night tonight. You can have all of today to rest, but Rose and I will be at your apartment tomorrow morning at 8AM sharp. We will spend the morning shopping and then spend the afternoon at the spa. No arguments and don't even think about bringing your wallet; I will be paying for everything."

"Alice, are you sure you're not still drunk? There is no way I'm letting you pay for it all!"

"I said no arguments Bella!"

"Alice really, I'm fine. You don't need to do this for me."

"I'm not doing it because I _have_ to, Bella. It's clear that you're having a hard time with this, so your best friends are going to be there for you. Rose and I will be there for you by being at your apartment tomorrow morning, 8AM sharp. And just remember that I do have the spare key you gave me for your apartment and I'm not afraid to use it."

**EPOV**

I was mentally cursing Alice for knocking as I walked away from them. Knowing my sister, she would be questing Bella as soon as I was out of the hall. I needed to explain things to Bella; tell her _why_ I left.

As I thought of ways to get Bella to talk to me, I attempted to find the kitchen for a glass of water. Alice and Jasper had a beautiful house that was probably bought for them to start a family in. _Like I could have had with Bella if I didn't leave._

"Mornin' Edward, how's the hang over?" My thoughts were interrupted by Jasper who was standing over the stove cooking breakfast… or lunch. _How long did I sleep for?_

"Just fine. I just need a glass of water and then I'm gonna head back to my apartment."

"Where are you living these days?"

"The Park Place building on Cherry Street. It's about a 15 minute drive from here."

"I've heard that name before, but I can't put my finger on it. Maybe an old friend lives there or something. How long have you been back?"

"Not long, about two weeks. Emmet's the only one that knew. I haven't even told my parents that I'm back yet. As far as I know, they still think I'm living in Italy."

"Why didn't you tell me you were coming back? We could have got together."

"No offence, but I knew you'd tell my sister. If Alice knew, she wouldn't be able to keep it from Bella, and I knew that Bella would be the last person to want to know I was back."

"So why'd you even leave? I mean, I get that you got a scholarship and all, but it's not like your parents didn't have the money to send you to any school in the world. Was it really all worth it, to be away from Bella for so long?"

"It was a top school. One that jump started my career and put me ahead of anyone else my age, so I can't say it was not worth it at all, but even if I've dreamed about becoming a doctor since I was a kid, none of that matters without having someone to share the joy with. Bella is the only person I want to share anything and everything with, and because I left for my career I can't do that yet."

"So why leave then, if you knew you wouldn't be happy?"

"I believe in fate, Jasper. I believe in soul mates and true love and I believe that there is only one person in this entire world that we are destined to be with. I also believe that that person is Bella. I believe that one day, Bella and I will be together again because I believe that's what the world intended for us. If she doesn't believe that and she wants to move on and forget about me, then I'll live with that, but I don't believe that that's the way it's supposed to end. It may have been a mistake to leave her without a goodbye, but I believe that she is the one for me and I just hope she feels the same way, because I am determined to make her mine again someday. I believe that there was a reason for me to get the scholarship and move away, even if I don't know what it is. I know that all of that is a lot of believing and not a lot of knowing, but I do know that Bella is the only girl I could ever love and I know that I will do whatever it takes to get her back in my life, even if it's as just a friend. There have been times over the last seven years where I doubted all the things I believed in, but seeing her again, getting to spend time being around her, even if I'm not talking to her, restores my faith in all the things that I ever doubted about us. "

I lifted my head to glance at Jasper and saw him looking right past me. I turned around to see Bella and Alice standing in the door way, listening to every word I had said. "How…how much of that did you hear?"

I tried scanning Bella's face for any form of emotion. I didn't care what emotion it was; I just wanted to know how she felt. The only thing I could identify was a look of pure shock.

She turned to Alice and gave her a hug, "I should get going. I have some work I need to finish if we're going to be out all day tomorrow."

I wanted to stop her. I wanted to hold her and talk to her and explain everything. I could see the tears in her eyes as she whispered goodbye to Jasper and ran for the door.

_Go after her you idiot!_ I started having an argument with myself in my head about whether or not I should. Just as I heard the front door opening for her to leave, I started running.

I needed to get to her before she left. I needed to know that things would eventually be okay between us.

Before I made it out of the kitchen, Alice stopped me. "You're not going after her, Edward."

"I have to! I need to explain things."

"She'll come to you when she's ready. She just found out you're back yesterday; she needs time to process it all."

"How long am I supposed to wait, Alice? 'Cause I'm willing to wait forever for her if I have to, but it would just be a lot less strain on my heart if I knew now."

"She can't tell you now! Just give her time, and wait for her to come to you. She was a zombie for _months_ after you left. She didn't do anything that wasn't necessary for her to live. Tears, school, work, food, sleep; that's what her days consisted of. Charlie called me every night to ask me to come over to try to stop her from crying. You _broke_ her, Edward! I know that you still love her, but if it were up to me you'd be waiting seven damn years for her 'cause that's how long she's waited for you."

Before I could say anything, she turned around and left the room. Alice had a lot of emotions, but never in my life had I seen her so angry before.

"Trust me Edward; you got off easy with her only saying that. I've had to rush to their airport countless times after you left to stop her from flying to Italy and dragging you home. She had a speech ready for you, if you ever came back and it was a hell of a lot worse than that one. She'll come around though, it's just hard for her to see Bella like this all over again."

"Do you think it all would have been OK if I had of stayed? I try not to think about that 'what ifs' but it's hard not to at times."

"Who knows? Alice and I had our share of troubles staying together with the stress of college, but we made it through every time because we knew we loved each other. If you and Bella still love each other as much as you did when you were 17 then you two will make it back together in the end."

"Yeah, I guess so." I didn't know what to do other than sigh. I wanted so badly to talk to Bella, but I didn't know where she was so I couldn't go after her. "I should get going now, you probably want to go and talk to Alice. Thanks for letting me crash here, and thanks for listening to all my issues. Even after seven years, you're still a great best friend."

* * *

**AN: Sorry for the late chapter. I was gone all day yesterday so I didn't have time to finish it until today. I hope to get another chapter out tonight but I'm not sure how it'll go.**


	6. I'll Keep Your Memory Vague

**BPOV**

There were so many things that I wanted to say to him. After overhearing him talking to Jasper I knew he still loved me. I wanted that to make me feel better, but it didn't. I wanted so badly to just run into his arms like I used to when we were 17, but I couldn't. As much as I still love him, how can I just forgive him so easily?

_I have to get him out of my head. _I needed some place to go; somewhere I could get away from it all. There was only one place that came to my mind; _our meadow._

I had only been back there once in the last seven years. Three months after he left, when I was finally starting to move on with my life, I got together a box of everything that reminded me of him or that he left at my house and I buried it in our meadow. I wrote a letter to him, put it in the box and told myself when, or if, he ever came back, I would give him that box. I only faintly remembered what was written in the letter to him, but I know that it was filled with anger and hurt. I wanted to give him the letter so he would know how broken I was when he was gone, but at the same time I didn't want to hurt him and I knew that giving him the box would do that.

No one knew about the box except for me. If Alice knew about the letter inside the box, she would tell me to give him the letter and not care about his feelings. I really _shouldn't_ care about his feelings; _he sure as hell didn't care about mine._

I wasn't sure how well I would handle being back at _our_ meadow. I knew that all the memories I tried to block out when I buried the box would come rushing back to me; the first time we went there, the last time we went there, and all the times in between. I had too many 'firsts' in that meadow with him to _not_ have the memories come back.

I was surprisingly calm by the time I arrived at our meadow. I thought all the memories mixed with what happened yesterday would cause my emotions to be all over the place, but I think actually being back there helped calm my nerves. _Edward and I can finally be together again!_ Part of me wanted to get back together with him, but the other part told me to wait. How did I know he wasn't going to leave again? It was like I had an angel and a devil sitting on each shoulder, but they looked like Edward. Angel Edward telling me to get back with him, telling me he loves me and would never leave and devil Edward telling me not to be so stupid. He left me, and hurt me more than I ever though possible… I couldn't just forgive him, could I?

I don't know how long I sat in our meadow but it felt like forever. I thought about all the memories and conversations shared. We went there almost every weekend so the memories were endless. I still remember the first time he showed me the meadow like it was yesterday.

_--Flashback—_

"_Where are we going Edward?"_

"_You'll see; it's a surprise."_

"_You know I hate surprises. And you know that I can barely walk on even ground so making me walk through these woods is going to end in disaster."_

"_Would you like me to carry you then?"_

"_I'm fine, but if I break a bone it's going to be your fault!"_

"_I wont let you fall, just trust me."_

"_I trust you."_

"_Good, now I trust you not to fall."_

"_I can't promise anything Edward, we just went over how-" Before I could finish my sentence, I tripped over a branch on the ground. I thought I was going to hit the ground, but Edward caught me before I could. "Damnit, I hate nature." _

"_I told you I wouldn't let you fall." I saw my favourite crooked grin appear on his face. I would give anything to be able to kiss him when he smiled like that._

"_You can put me down now, Edward."_

"_I think I'll carry you instead. I promised not to let you break any bones and carrying you seems to be the safest way to make sure I keep my promise."_

"_Put me down before you hurt us both!"_

"_Nope, I think I like this way much better." His crooked smile once again appeared on his face and I couldn't argue with him anymore._

_A little while later, we were standing in a beautiful meadow filled with wildflowers._

"_Where are we Edward?"_

"_I found this place a few weeks ago when I was hiking. I mapped out the route and ever since then I've wanted to bring you here. It's a nice spot, isn't it?"_

"_It is very nice. Could be romantic, too. You should bring Lauren Mallory here sometime."_

"_You know that I don't like Lauren."_

"_Well she likes you."_

"_Well I guess that's too bad for her, my heart is already taken."_

"_Your heart is taken? Edward Anthony Cullen, you never told me you had a crush!"_

"_It's not a crush, Bella."_

"_Okay Mr. Old-fashioned, what is it then?"_

"_I don't know how to describe it… but it feels amazing. Every time I see her I just want to hold her in my arms and make sure she never gets hurt. It doesn't matter anyways though; she just likes me as a friend."_

"_Oh come on Edward, you could get any girl in the school to go out with you, you're gorgeous!"_

"_You think I'm gorgeous?" Damn him and his crooked smile. I could feel my face getting hotter as he looked at me._

"_Well I don't know, that's just what I hear."_

"_Admit it, you think I'm gorgeous."_

"_Oh yes Edward, I think you are the most gorgeous person in the whole wide world."_

"_You know, 50 percent of what people say when they are joking, or in your case being sarcastic, is true."_

"_Is it now?" I suddenly realized how close together Edward and I had gotten. Our faces were only inches apart and I could feel his breath on my face._

"_That's what they say, what do I know though?"_

_Before I knew what was happened, Edward leaned towards me and I felt his lips meet mine. I could feel my heart beat increase to what had to be an unhealthy rate. We sat there for a few moments, lips together, and it was like the world stopped spinning._

_All too soon he pulled away and I opened my eyes to see him smiling. I'm sure my face had just a big of a grin on it, if not bigger than he did._

"_What was that, Edward?"_

"_I'm sorry…you have no idea how long I've wanted to do that for. I think maybe since the day I first met you. It sounds so cliché, but I think it was love at first sight." I could feel tears starting to form in my eyes. I had wanted to be with Edward since the day I first met him._

_I pulled his face to mine and kissed him. It wasn't slow this time; it was filled with all the passion and lust I had built up for him over the last year of our friendship._

_He pulled away after a few seconds and smiled at me once again._

"_Isabella Swan, will you be my girlfriend?"_

"_Of course I will, Edward."_

_He kissed me once again, and we spent the remainder of our afternoon lying together in the meadow, talking, kissing and just holding each other._

_I had never been happier._

_--End Flashback--_

* * *

**AN: I had a major case of writers block so I ended up with this filler. I have an idea of what to do for the next chapter so hopefully that one doesn't take so long.**


	7. Where Would We Be Now?

**EPOV**

Emmett had dropped my car off at Jasper's earlier this morning so I was able to get home quickly and get away from Alice before she yelled at me some more. I loved my sister, and I knew she had a point, but I didn't want to wait. I was going to try to give her some time, but I just wanted to talk to her once to explain things.

I was glad that this was my weekend off. At the hospital we had day shift, afternoon shift and nightshift. When I was on days or afternoons, I would have the weekend off. If I was on night shift, I would have to work all weekend but then I would get a week off. I was just finishing my week of day shift so I had all of today and tomorrow to think of a way to talk to Bella. It could be a little hard considering I had no clue where she lived or worked and I had no contact information about her. _I should have paid more attention to her forms when she was at the hospital._ I was determined to think of something though. Someway, somehow… I would talk to Bella.

**BPOV**

When I got back to my truck after going to the meadow the clock read 6:37. I had left Alice's at three, which meant I had spent the last three hours only thinking of Edward. I was completely _dreading_ tomorrows 'girls day out' but I knew Alice would never let me out of it.

During the three hours I spent at the meadow I did a lot of thinking about if I wanted to talk to Edward. I had decided that when, or if, I saw him again and I could handle it without breaking down in tears, I would try to explain to him _why_ it was so hard for me to see him again. He wasn't there to see how bad off I was. He wasn't there to see me in hysterics when I tried to run away to Italy. I wanted him to know how hurt I was because of him, and then maybe we could try to be friends. I thought about digging up my 'Edward box' and giving him the letter inside of it, but I decided when I saw him I'd just tell him how I felt.

By the time I made it back to my apartment it was raining cats and dogs. I heard on the radio on my way home that it was expected to get worse and not let up until morning. When I first moved from Phoenix to Forks in high school, I hated the rain. By the time I moved to Seattle after college I had become used to the rain and had now grown to love thunder storms. It was different when it rained in the winter though. I hated it then. All the rain would become ice and I'm clumsy enough on dry, non-slippery land.

I got out of my truck while trying to stay away from any ice. In the back of the parking lot I noticed a car that I had never seen in the parking lot before; a shiny, silver Volvo.

_It couldn't be… there is no way. He doesn't even know where I live!_

After pausing to convince myself that my ex boyfriend was not stalking me, I made my way inside. I lived on the 9th floor of the apartment building so I was grateful that the elevator was still working. A lot of the time during big storms they would shut it down to prevent from anyone getting stuck in it if the power was to go out.

I was the only one in the elevator as the doors started closing. I loved riding the elevator when I was alone because it was peaceful. Just as the doors were almost fully closed, someone stuck their arm full of grocery bags in the door to make it open.

I pushed the button inside to open the doors and in stepped none other than Edward Cullen.

Once he was fully in the elevator he pushed the button for floor 11 and turned to see me for the first time.

"Oh… I can um… take the stairs. You were in here first so if you don't want me to-"

"Its fine, it's not like it's my elevator."

"Do you um… live in this building?"

"Mhm. Floor 9"

"Oh… I see. I um… live on floor 11."

"How long have you lived here for?"

"About two weeks. I swear I didn't know you lived here! It was the only building close enough to the hospital with an apartment available on such short notice."

"Oh…"

The ride was completely silent until I heard a loud bang.

"What the hell was that?!"

"Damnit…damnit… DAMNIT!"

"Bella… are you alright?"

"The elevator stopped. The stupid storm must have cut the power out. We're stuck!"

"Are you sure? Do you think we could just be… stopping at another floor?"

"Look at the lights! They are all out! See how the floor buttons aren't lit up anymore? THEY SHOULD BE!"

I looked over at him and he looked shocked at my little… outburst.

"Oh god, I didn't mean to snap at you. I get stressed in situations like this. I love elevators but I get a little claustrophobic when they stop."

"Just… stay calm. I'm sure we'll be fine."

"WE'RE GOING TO DIE! WE HAVE NO FOOD OR ANYTHING TO KEEP US ALIVE; WE'RE GOING TO DIE!"

"If you start freaking out it's going to seem a lot worse than it is. We'll be fine. They will have the power back on soon and until then we have enough food. I just came back from grocery shopping so we can eat that."

I went to sit down beside the doors of the elevator. He was right, I guess. There was no use worrying over it when I couldn't do anything about it.

**EPOV**

After Bella calmed down, we spent the next 15 minutes in silence. I wanted to talk to her, but I decided to take Alice's advice and wait for her to talk to me. I knew if I tried to talk to her now she would just freak out because she was stressed.

We spent another 10 minutes in silence until I heard her take a deep breath.

"Exactly a year after you left, I flew to Italy. Everyone thought I had moved on… but I hadn't. It was just after what would have been our two year anniversary and it just got to me I guess. We had just started college and one weekend I just… left. Alice, Jasper, Rose, Emmett and I all shared a three bedroom apartment. Of course, they noticed I was gone 

but no one knew where I was. I wouldn't pick up any of their call. I don't even know _why_ I went… but I did. I think maybe I just wanted to see you…and make sure you were ok. Maybe a part of me wanted to see if you were _with_ anyone… but I never even left the airport. I must have been hallucinating or something… but I thought I saw you in the airport. When that happened, I turned around and got the next flight home. When I got home, I told everyone I was fine but it was like I was on suicide watch. Someone was always with me… making sure I didn't leave again. Someone would be outside of each of my classes to make sure I went to the next one and Alice would force me to go with her everywhere.

When you left… I wasn't the same person. All I did was sit around and cry. For three months, I was… a zombie. I barely talked to anyone outside of school despite their attempts to get me to get out of the house. I would see Alice every night when Charlie would call her to try to get me to stop crying, but I never really _talked_ to her. I would cry and she would try to comfort me, but it would never help.

I never stepped a foot near your house again after you left. Even after I started to think I was ok… I still wouldn't go near it. I knew that it was hard on them too, they were your _family_…but I didn't know how to be in there without you. Before we were even friends I would go there with Alice but you were _always _there. I didn't know how to be there without you… so I just never went back. I went back to _our _meadow once. Then I went there today again for the first time in six years and I sat there for three hours just thinking about us…how we used to be and all the time we spent in that meadow.

This morning when I heard you talking to Jasper I was so scared. Scared that maybe you actually were just as miserable in Italy as I was in Forks. I wanted so badly to just jump into your arms and be able to have you hold me like when we were 17 but I couldn't. So I left… I needed to think. I got to do lots of thinking today and I realized that still love you Edward, even though I shouldn't. Well, I knew I always still loved you. When you were gone, even when I was miserable, I never hated you for leaving. I led everyone to believe I did but I could never hate you. I love you just as much now as I did when we were 17…but I shouldn't. And I just know that things can't go back to the way they were. I want them to…but after seven years we don't even know each other anymore. So I want us to be friends…I mean, if you want to be of course. Maybe in the future we'll be together again but right now we just need to get to know each other all over again."

I hadn't realized it, but I was now sitting only inches away from Bella. Before I could stop myself, I was pulling her into my arms. I just needed to be able to hold her.

"I know it doesn't help anything Bella, but you have _no idea_ how miserable I was without you. My family would e-mail me and I would try to read them all and reply, but if they mentioned your name I couldn't. I felt so guilty for leaving you. I wanted to badly to come home but I thought you hated me for leaving. I tried to tell myself that it was for the best…that if we were really meant to be we'd be together in the end. I was going to come back as a surprise for you. I think it may have been the same day you flew to Italy, because I thought I saw you in the airport but I convinced myself that it couldn't be you. I was just about to get on a plane when I thought I saw you, but I couldn't bring myself to go when I saw how sad the look on the girls face was. I told myself it wasn't you… but now I think it could have been. It was around the same time you said you went. I had a week off school so I thought I would go back and surprise everyone. No one knew, so when I saw you I just turned around because I realized how much I hurt everyone. I wished so many times that I never left.

I applied for that scholarship I got before we were even friends. I never thought that I would fall in love by the time I found out I got accepted. When I got the letter, I hid it from everyone because I had no clue what to do. I wanted so badly to stay with you, but at the same time it was a once in a lifetime opportunity. I was almost convinced I was going to stay but I knew I would never forgive myself for giving up the opportunity. I wanted to talk to you about it so badly but if I did you would have told me to go and then felt guilty if I didn't. When I started thinking about how much you would support me if I went… I started to think that I didn't deserve you. I thought you could have done so much better than someone who was considering leaving you. So I let it get to me and I just left. Part of me regrets it, but another part of me feels like it gave us a chance to see that we really are soul mates, Bella. In the seven years that I was gone here was not a single girl that could have compared to you. I had all kinds of girls throwing themselves at me but none of them mattered to me. I was miserable for about 3 years after I left, but then I realized that we would be together again. I didn't know when, but I knew it would happen. I could never love anyone as much as I loved you Bella. I still love you, maybe even more than I did when we were 17. You are the only girl I could ever love Bella. I may have been in Italy, but my heart was always with you."

I slowly turned to face her and I was scared to see her reaction. Before I could see what it was, she put her hands on my face and pulled my lips to hers.

For the first time in seven years, I was back where I belonged.

* * *

**AN: I feel so evil right now **


	8. Elevator Love

**BPOV**

My mind was screaming 'just friends', but my heart was screaming 'let's be how we used to be'. I tried to stop myself, but he was here and saying all the right things; I just couldn't resist.

As soon as he finished talking, I put my hands on his cheeks and pulled him towards me. What was meant to be a small kiss was quickly deepened and I was soon pushed onto the elevator floor, with Edward on top of me.

Before I could realize what I was doing, my hands were roaming under Edward's shirt. I didn't think it was possibly, but his chest was even more muscular than it was seven years ago. I felt like we were 17 again; like he never left and we were still together.

His shirt was quickly removed from his body and thrown to the other side of the elevator. He put his hands under my shirt and rested them on my torso as he removed his lips from mine and started placing kisses all over my neck.

"Bella…are you….sure this is….what you want?" Edward asked between kisses.

"Shut up…and keep kissing…"

I started grabbing for Edward's belt as he continued kissing my neck. I had it almost completely off when I felt myself moving.

I froze where I was and immediately pushed Edward away.

"What's wrong, Bella?" He asked, completely out of breath.

"The elevator… it's moving again. SHIT!"

I quickly got up from the floor and went to get Edward's shirt. I threw it at him and tried my best to make myself look like I wasn't doing anything that wasn't G-Rated.

Edward finished putting his shirt on just as the elevator doors started opening.

"Bella, should we talk about this?"

I glanced at my watch to see that it was already 7:30. _How long were we stuck in here for? _

"I live in apartment 9-17. Come at around 8:30 and I'll order Chinese food or something. Just friends, Edward. We can talk about everything and just get to know each other all over again."

"Are you sure about this?"

"Yes Edward, for now we need to be friends."

"No I mean… are you sure about me coming over? I know that me being back here is hard for you and I just don't want to hurt you anymore."

"I'm sure. I think we are both mature enough to be friends, and that's what this is. We are just old friends getting together after a long separation."

"Ok Bella, I'll see you then."

I stepped out of the elevator and starting walking towards my apartment. Before the elevator doors closed, Edward stepped out.

"We'll never be 'just friends', Bella. I'll try for you but it's not going to change how I feel about you."

* * *

**AN: I know this chapter is short but I wanted to get it up ASAP.**


	9. Till We Ain't Strangers Anymore

**BPOV**

It felt like time was moving backwards. I was pacing around my couch, waiting for Edward to arrive. _8:26… same as last time you checked._ _I never should have invited him to come over… this is such a bad idea._ I spent the last hour arguing with myself about whether or not this was a mistake. I don't _regret_ what happened in the elevator, but I couldn't let it happen again. Friends aren't supposed to make out in elevators! They _can_ hang out together though. _We used to hang out, just the two of us all the time before! Why should it be different now?_

I glanced over at the clock n the stove again_. 8:28…he should be here soon._

I don't know why I was so nervous. I felt like I was a teenager waiting for her crush to pick her up for their first date. _This is not a date! _ No. Edward and I are just friends. It would be tough, but it's what we had to do.

_Beeeeep_

I jumped at the sound of the doorbell and my heart started racing. _He's here!_

I took a few deep breaths before walking over towards the door. I quickly glanced in the mirror beside the door to make sure I looked okay.

I took a deep breath and opened the door.

"Delivery for Bella Swan." Standing at the door was a grinning Edward with the Chinese food I had ordered for us.

"How did you get that? It's not supposed to be here for another 15 minutes."

"The delivery guy was coming up in the elevator at the same time I did so I offered to take it for him. I gave him an extra generous tip too."

"You shouldn't have paid for it Edward! Here, let me pay you back I have all the money on the-" He put his hand out, motioning for me to stop talking.

"It's my treat, Bella. Besides, I'll be eating it too."

"At least let me give you half the money."

"I'm not going to take your money, Bella. Friends buy friends food, so this is allowed."

"I don't like it when people spend money on me."

"I know. You didn't like it when we were 17 either, but I still did it then."

"Yeah well nothing else! Would you like something to drink? I have Coke, Wine or Beer."

"I'll have a coke, please."

"Sure, let me just pour it into a glass for you. Have a seat and make yourself comfortable. You're the first person other than Alice, Rose, Jasper or Emmett to be in my apartment so I'm not used to guests."

"How long have you lived here for?"

"Oh, just a few months. I was living with Jasper and Alice until they got married. They told me I was free to stay with them but I didn't want to intrude on their married life."

"Ah, yes. I don't think anyone would want to live with them as a married couple. I had a hard enough time just having a room next to Alice back home. Those walls were much too thin."

"Try living with the two of them _and_ Rose and Emmett. That was quite the experience. I think I may be permanently scarred from the image of Emmett's ass after walking in on him and Rose one too many times."

"How many times did you walk in on them?" He laughed. _God, I missed his laugh._

"Just once. It was more than enough for me." I said as I handed him his coke.

He chuckled as he took a sip of his coke while I sat down in the armchair beside the couch he was sitting on.

We sat in a bit of an awkward silence until he spoke again.

"So where do you work?"

"I write magazine articles for 'Seattle Monthly'. It's not an amazing job, but the pay is enough to get me by until I can find something more permanent."

"What was your major in college?"

"Creative writing. I hope to become an author someday, so I guess the magazine is good practice." I looked over at Edward who seemed to be staring at me. "Edward?"

"You still wear it."

"Still wear what?" He was still staring at me, but his eyes weren't on my face. I glanced down at myself when I remembered what I had around my neck. "Oh," I started blushing "that. If you want it back or something I would understand since you bought it and-"

"I just can't believe that after all this time, you still wear it. I mean, I wouldn't have blamed you if you had wanted to chuck it out the window. I never thought you would keep it, let alone still wear it."

"I know that you paid a ridiculous amount for it, so I didn't want it to go to waste."

"I'm glad that you still wear it. It was a gift, Bella. Don't worry about how much it cost."

"How much exactly did it cost, Mr. Cullen? You never would tell me."

"And I'm still not going to." He said with a smug smile on his face.

"I still remember the day you gave it to me. It was-"

"Our one year anniversary… 8 days before I left."

_--Flashback—_

"_Edward, where are we going?"_

"_You'll find out when we get there." He said as he handed me a piece of cloth "Put this over your eyes. I don't want you peeking."_

"_Edward Cullen, I told you not to do anything big. I don't want you spending money on me!"_

"_It's a little too late for that, love. Humor me, please. It's not just for you; it's for me too."_

"_Oh what did you do, Edward?"_

"_You'll find out soon. Now put the blindfold on."_

"_I don't like this Edward."_

"_You trust me, don't you?"_

"_Of course I do."_

"_Good, because I need to carry you from here."_

"_You're going to hurt us both, Edward! I'm too heavy for you to carry."_

"_Don't be absurd, Bella. I've carried you before and we are both still fine. You are not too heavy for me; you fit perfectly in my arms."_

_I heard his car door shut and before I could have a chance to peek at where we were, he was opening my door._

"_I hope you're not peeking, Ms. Swan."_

"_I would never dream of it, Mr. Cullen." I felt his arms slip under my knees as he lifted me off the seat. "Is this really necessary Edward?"_

"_I want to get there as quickly as possible, so yes, it is."_

"_Are you calling me slow?"_

"_No, I'm simply stating that you have the ability to find something to trip over when your eyes are open, so as long as you're blindfolded you will be in my arms."_

"_Then just let me take the blindfold off, Edward. I miss being able to see your face."_

"_Don't try to dazzle me, love. Besides, we're almost there."_

"_Can I have just a little clue as to where we're going?"_

"_Nope."_

"_You can't see it, but I'm giving you my 'death stare' under this blindfold."_

_I heard a slight chuckle come from his lips. "I can live with that."_

_We spend the next few minutes in silence as he walked. I gave up on trying to get any information out of him, knowing it was doing no good._

"_We're here."_

"_Can I take the blindfold off now?" I asked as I felt my feet being put onto the ground._

"_Not yet, I need to make sure everything is in place."_

"_What's that smell Edward? It smells like-"_

"_Do I need to plug your nose, too? Please be patient, love. You'll find out soon enough."_

"_Fine, but I'm not happy about this."_

"_You will be Bella, trust me."_

_I stood in silence, trying to figure out by sound and smell where I was. Before I could figure out where I was, I felt Edward put his arms around me from behind. I don't know how he did it, but he made removing a blindfold unbelievably sexy._

"_You can open your eyes now, love." He said in almost a whisper._

_I slowly opened my eyes to take in the sight in front of me. Edward had somehow transformed our meadow into the most romantic picnic setting._

"_Edward, you didn't have to do all this." I could feel the tears welling up in my eyes._

"_Shh, Bella, I wanted to."_

"_How did you get all of this here?"_

_There was a large picnic blanket set up with a basket in the middle. There were candles all around the blanket making everything look so much more romantic. It was nearing twilight so the sky was a deep purple and orange. Everything looked so perfect._

"_I had some help. Emmett, Jasper and I spent all of today preparing for this."_

"_This is too much Edward."_

"_Nothing is too much for my Bella."_

"_I love you, Edward. More than you could ever imagine."_

"_I love you too, Isabella. I have something for you."_

"_Edward, all of this is more than enough! I don't need anything else from you."_

"_This was for both of us, love. What I have for you now, it's just for you."_

"_You better not have spent any money on me." I saw a sly smile appear on his face. "Edward Anthony Cullen, you know I don't like it when you do that!"_

"_We went over this already Bella; it's too late for that." He said as he pulled someone out of his pocket. "Look inside."_

_I opened the large rectangular box and I felt the first tear fall down my cheek. Inside the box was a beautiful heart shaped pendant necklace. The heart was made up entirely of diamonds and I knew it had to be worth a lot._

"_Why are you crying, love? Don't you like it?"_

"_No it's not that, I love it. It's so beautiful Edward, I can't accept this."_

_"You can and you will. It's a gift Bella."_

"_It's too much Edward! This must have cost you a fortune."_

"_Don't you worry about that Bella." He said as he started taking the necklace out of its box. "Charlie would freak out if I gave you a ring and I want something to show that you are mine. This will have to do for now." _

_He moved my hair to the side of my neck and clasped the necklace around my neck._

"_It's beautiful Edward, thank you."_

"_Nothing is as beautiful as you, my Bella."_

"_I love it, and I love you."_

"_I love you too, Bella. More than you could ever imagine."_

_I looked down at the pendant on my neck and then looked back up at Edward._

"_I don't know what to say Edward. You didn't have to give me this."_

"_I know Bella, but I wanted to. You don't need to say anything." _

_He slowly leaned towards me and placed a quick kiss on my lips. Before he could move away, I put my hands on the back of his neck and pulled him back into me, my lips meeting his._

"_We have food to eat Bella." He said in a strained voice as we broke apart for air._

"_Food can wait. There is something much tastier right in front of me."_

"_It will get cold."_

"_So let it get cold." I pulled him back to me again and reached for the buttons on his shirt as I was kissing him. When that was gone, I reached for the button on his pants._

"_Slow down Bella, are you sure you want this?"_

"_Don't you?"_

"_Of course I do Bella, I want everything with you. I just want to make sure you're ready."_

"_I'm more than ready, Edward. I've wanted this for awhile."_

"_I don't want to hurt you."_

"_You won't hurt me Edward, at least not in a bad way."_

"_Do we need to use… I mean, we never talked about if we would need any kind of-"_

"_I've been on the pill since I was 14, Edward. We're covered."_

"_Are you sure you're ready for this? It's a big step."_

"_I've never been more sure, Edward. I love you and nothing will ever change that."_

_He pulled me into another kiss and my hands made their way back to the button on his pants. He placed his hands on the bottom of my shirt and slowly removed it from my body._

_He moved his hands onto my back and unhooked my bra, letting it fall to the ground and leaving my upper half completely exposed to him._

"_You are so beautiful, Bella." _

_He slowly removed my jeans, leaving me in only my lacy underwear. I'd have to thank Alice for making me wear these later._

_He stepped out of his own dress pants which were already around his ankles and I started tugging at his dark blue boxers. I had no experience in this area, but from the size of the bulge in his pants he seemed to be rather 'gifted' in his southern region._

_His eyes were locked on mine as I removed the last piece of fabric that was keeping me from seeing all of him._

_As soon as his boxers hit the ground, I felt my jaw drop. Before I had a chance to react, Edward started pulling me closer by the tiny bows on the side of my lace underwear._

"_I find it very unfair that I am standing here completely naked while you still have something covering you."_

"_Are you going to do something about that?"_

_He pulled me into a deep kiss, and I could feel his hard member pressing into my stomach. His hands trailed up and down my body before finally resting on my hips. He slowly started removing the last piece of lace from my body and I could feel the blush on my cheeks._

"_Don't be shy, love; you're beautiful."_

_He slowly pulled us both down onto the picnic blanket and was hovering overtop of me. I could feel his eyes looking over every inch of my body and I realized I had no way to hide my body from him. He bent down and starting kissing all over my neck and shoulders._

_I started squirming underneath him and he stopped kissing my neck to smile at me._

"_Stop hiding yourself from me, it just makes me want you even more."_

_He put his lips back on my neck and slowly starting kissing his way down my body. He didn't stop kissing until he reached my inner thigh, right below my heated core._

"_There's no going back now, love."_

"_I don't want to go back. I love you Edward; I want to feel you inside of me."_

"_I love you, Bella." He slowly slipped himself inside of me and my heart started beating faster than ever. A small moan escaped my lips and I felt myself clamp around him._

"_You feel so amazing Bella." _

"_Oh god, Edward."_

_I kissed him with as much passion as I could and he continued thrusting inside of me, going in a little deeper and a little faster everytime._

_I started feeling something I never had before, and whatever it was made my toes curl. I felt myself release with him still inside of me, and seconds later he did the same._

_He stayed inside of me as we both fought to catch our breath._

"_That was…"_

"_Amazing. I love you, Bella."_

"_I love you too, Edward."_

_--End Flashback—_

* * *

**AN: Sorry for the delay. This will be the last update until probably Monday because I'm spending the weekend at my friend's. I'm getting back Sunday night but I may not have time to update. I hope this chapter made up for it.**


	10. Should've Said No

**BPOV**

Edward and I spent the rest of the night talking, laughing and just catching up. It's not like I spent all of the last seven years completely miserable, but I forgot how nice it felt to be genuinely happy. I had smiled and laughed many times when he was gone, but I finally felt like myself with him back. When he was gone, I knew I was only getting on with my life for my friends and family.

I didn't expect Edward and I to get back together right away or even anytime soon, but just to be with him again felt like old times; like before we were together, when we were best friends.

By 9:00, Edward and I had broken into my liqueur cabinet to get past the slight awkwardness of the night. It was stocked full for whenever Alice or Rosalie stopped by and needed a drink, but other than that I rarely went into it.

By 10:00, Edward and I were both drunk. We had gotten into the tequila that was specifically for Rose and the bottle was now completely empty.

By 11:00, Edward and I could no longer go more than 10 seconds without bursting into a hysterical fit of giggles, which would just set the other one off into a giggle fit.

By 1:00, Edward and I had somehow migrated onto my bed and we were both sprawled over it (and each other), and were fast asleep.

* * *

"Bella, I swear to god if you don't open this door in the next ten seconds I will break it down!"

I heard multiple loud knocks and I wasn't sure if they were coming from the door or my head pounding.

"10! 9! 8!"

"Who is making all the damn noise?"

I looked beside me to see Edward covering his head with a pillow while grunting.

"It's your sister. Go let her in before she breaks down the door."

"It's your house!"

"But you're closer! Please Edward, just go." I shoved my head under the pillow and wrapped myself in the blankets to try to get as much rest as I possibly could before Alice and Rose came in.

"Fine, but I'm only doing it to see their reactions to me being here."

**EPOV**

I dragged myself out of Bella's bed and made my way to the front door.

"You have three more seconds Bella!"

I opened the front door as Alice was mid-knock, causing her to stumble forwards a little.

"It's about time Bell-" She froze and raised her eyebrow at me standing in the doorway. "You're not Bella. Why are you in Bella's apartment? And why aren't you wearing a shirt?"

I looked down at myself, unaware of the fact that I was shirtless.

"Oh god and you don't have any pants on either! Edward I do not need to see your pasty white legs! Where the hell is Bella?!"

"Good morning to you too, Alice. Last time I saw you, you were yelling at me."

"Or right, Jasper wanted me to apologize to you for that. Sorry for being a bitch Edward, I'm just very protective of Bella, especially with you."

"That's fine Alice, I deserved it. Come in, Bella's in her room. Try to be nice, she probably has a hangover."

She stepped into Bella's apartment and took a look around. I followed her eyes to see a mess of empty bottles and glasses thrown all over the place. In the middle of the room I saw a deck of cards strewn around and random pieces of clothing.

"Isabella Marie Swan get your ass out of bed right now! You have a lot of explaining to do! I'd like to know why my brother is half naked in your apartment!"

"I think those cards explain my lack of clothing. Strip poker maybe, I don't really remember much of what happened."

"You didn't have sex with Bella did you?! Please tell me Bella didn't forgive you that easily!"

"We're just friends, Alice. She invited me over last night to catch up and I guess we had a little too much to drink."

"BELLA! GET OUT OF BED!"

I heard slight groans coming from Bella's room and I knew it wouldn't be long before Rose and Alice dragged her out of bed.

"Why are you two here at such an ungodly hour? Let her sleep!"

"Bella, Rose and I are having a girl's day out. I told her we would be here at 8am sharp."

"Just let her sleep Alice, she has a hang-"

"Shut up, Edward. We are taking her for a girl's day." Rose interrupted as she and Alice made their way to Bella's room.

I followed them in there hoping to be able to persuade them to let Bella sleep. It was my fault she had a hangover anyways.

"Just let her sleep another hour! There is a whole day for you two to torture her."

"You trying to protect her is cute and all my dear brother-in-law, but you have no say in this matter as you are no longer her boyfriend." Rose said with a smile. "You messed that up years ago."

"You sound just like Emmett. You two really are perfect for each other."

"I know." Her smile grew even wider as she turned back to Bella's room.

"Alice and Rose, I'm going to kill you!" I heard Bella mumble from under the pillow.

"Too bad my dear best friend, you agreed to this girl's day so you are coming with us!"

"Edward she is your sister, deal with her!"

"Oh no Bella, Edward isn't getting you out of this one! I'll give you half an hour to shower and change while Rose and I wait here. Edward will even make you breakfast while you shower, won't you Edward?"

"I never should have agreed to this stupid girl's day."

"You'll have fun Bella, trust me!"

"If you know what's safe for you Bella, I would get out of bed. I've faced the wrath of Alice more than enough times growing up. Just get in the shower and I'll have breakfast made for you when you get out." I said, trying to comfort her. I knew Alice would torture her if she didn't go with ease.

"I hate you all!" She said as she walked into her bathroom.

"You know you love us Bella!"

* * *

**AN: I'm back! Well I've been back for two days but I had slight writers block, which explains the short chapter. Girl's Day is finally here!**


	11. Girl's Just Wanna Have Fun

**BPOV**

After we left my apartment, Alice and Rose immediately started interrogating me about Edward and why we were hanging out. I explained everything to them starting with what happened in the elevator.

"Are you sure nothing happened while you two were drunk? I mean, you got so hot and heavy in the elevator and he barely had clothes on when we got there so maybe you just don't remember it happening."

"Trust me Alice, with Edward I would have remembered if we had sex. He's pretty unforgettable."

"Ew, that's my brother you're talking about."

"Right, sorry. But no, I'm positive we didn't _do_ anything; I remember most of what happened. After a few bottles of tequila we started playing strip poker. I remember totally beating his ass, which explains his lack of clothing. That's it."

"If you say so." Alice replied with her signature "I-don't-believe-a-word-that-you're-saying" smirk.

"Can we just get shopping already?" We had arrived at the mall a few minutes ago but had sat in the car talking.

"Is Bella Swan _excited_ to go shopping?" Rose asked with a sarcastic shocked face.

"No, but the sooner we get in there, the sooner you two stop asking me about Edward. Let's go!"

"Don't worry Bella, we can ask and shop at the same time."

**XXXXXXX**

By the end of the day I had way too many new outfits (courtesy of Alice), numerous blisters all over my feet and absolutely no hair left on my body below my neck.

Alice had convinced (or forced, depending on how you look at it) me to get some outfits that I never would have got on my own. They were just a little too bold and a lot too revealing for my taste, but no matter what I said Alice insisted on buying them anyways.

She had also bought me ridiculously high stiletto shoes with open toes. She insisted on me wearing them for the rest of the day at the mall so I could break them in so we could do dancing. By the time all the blisters I got from the shoes healed, it would be weeks before we went dancing.

When Alice and Rose finally decided I had been tortured enough for one morning, we made a quick stop at the food court to pick up lunch to go before heading to the spa. Alice and Rose opted for vegetarian subs from Subway, but I went for a Big Mac meal from McDonalds. I was starving after a morning full of shopping and it was just screaming out at me. I told myself that I burned off more than enough calories with all the walking around this morning to deserve a Big Mac. I knew I would have gotten it even if I only walked for five minutes, but it made me feel slightly better to tell myself that I deserved it.

The spa was no better than shopping in the torture department. Alice insisted on me getting a full Brazilian, leg, eyebrow and underarm wax. Rose tried to help out and suggested I start big and painful so if I was to end with the eyebrow wax it wouldn't feel nearly as painful as the Brazilian or leg wax, but no matter what I started or ended with I knew it was going to be painful.

I had only ever got waxed once, and that was 7 years ago. Alice had known Edward was planning something special for our one year anniversary so she dragged me in to get waxed 'just incase anything happened'.

It was almost 9 by the time we got back to my apartment and as soon as we were inside they were already into the alcohol.

"Seriously guys, I don't want to be drunk for the third night in a row. It makes me seem like an alcoholic."

"Your ex boyfriend is back in town after seven years, people will understand if you want to drink the pain away every night."

"I'm fine Alice, Edward and I are friends now."

"Just friends, Bella?"

"We did just fine as 'just friends' before we dated so I'm sure we can do it again."

"Oh please Bella. You and Edward have never been 'just friends'. Even before you two were dating it was obvious to everyone but the two of you that you two loved each other. Even Carlisle and Esme saw it."

"Shut up, Rose. You and Emmett were no better with your weekly break ups."

"But it never took us a year to get back together. We always knew we loved each other so we knew we were never actually 'broken up'. It was just silly little fights that resulted in great make up sex."

"God Rose, you're just as bad as Bella! I do not need to know about my brothers' sex lives!"

"It's not like you never tell me about you and Jasper."

"Okay, can we just order food now? I'm starving." I had to interrupt them or else we'd never get food.

"What are we in the mood for tonight ladies?"

"You and Rose can pick this time, but I'm paying. You and Rose paid for more than enough of my stuff today and Edward paid for the food last night so I still have my weekly take out money here."

It had become a tradition that once a week, the three of us would get together and have a girl's night in. Whoever's house we were at provided the alcohol and the other two would take care of the chick flicks and food. Tonight I was going to make sure I paid for it all no matter how much they tried to pitch in.

"Bella, today was our way of helping you deal with this Edward stuff. You are not paying."

"I told you two I am _fine._ We are friends and I am paying. End of discussion."

"Well if you're paying then you should get to decide what we have. That's always been the rule."

"Well I have decided to have whatever you two want tonight, so you can choose. The takeout menus are in the-"

"Drawer on the top left under the microwave, we know."

Most weeks our girl's night was held at my place so we could avoid Jasper or Emmett interrupting us. Rose and Alice would often vent about the typical marital problems and fights of the week so they had gotten fed up with their husbands listening in. We never had to deal with interruptions from men if we had it at my place.

At least not until Edward lived in my building.

Rose and Alice had ordered the food and when we heard a knock on the door 40 minutes later, we assumed it was our Tai food delivery. I went to the door and grabbed the money from the counter and for the second night in a row I opened the door to Edward holding boxes of take out food.

He must have noticed the shocked look on my face because he seemed to be taken off guard.

"I swear this wasn't on purpose! I live in 11-17 so I guess they mixed up the floors. I paid for it and just decided to bring it up myself to make sure Alice and Rose weren't torturing you too much."

"You didn't need to pay for it Edward, you could have just told him he had the wrong floor."

"Hey, it's what friend's do."

"I'm not letting you pay for the food two nights in a row." I tried handing him the money but he wouldn't take it.

"It's on me Bella, don't worry about it."

"Well if you paid for it you should get to eat some. Come in and we'll eat."

Rose was already a little tipsy, but Alice had opted out of drinking. She said she had enough of a hangover yesterday and she didn't want another one tomorrow. Rose didn't want to drink alone so I made a few weaker drinks for myself.

**EPOV**

As soon as I walked into the living room where Alice and Rose were, they both stopped talking and their jaws immediately dropped to the floor.

"What are you doing here?"

"I come with food. It was dropped off on the wrong floor."

"But why are you in _here?_" Rose asked, her sense of rudeness clearly gone with the alcohol.

"Aw Rose, it's nice to see you too."

"Don't mind her; she gets a little rude when she's drunk."

"It's ok. Why aren't you as drunk as her, Alice? You're always the first one to get wasted."

"I'm uh, still recovering from my last hangover. Can I talk to you for a second?"

"Sure, what do you need?"

"No I mean, can we talk in private?"

"Um sure I guess."

She led me into the hallway and looked very nervous. "What wrong, Alice?"

"Okay I know that this isn't really your area of expertise but you're the only doctor I know so I figured it's best to just ask you. But you have to promise not to tell anyone!"

"What is it?"

"If I was to drink alcohol and not know I was pregnant while I had it, would it hurt the baby? 'Cause I had all the signs of pregnancy for the last week but I just thought it was a cold until I was late yesterday. And I know that Jasper really wants a baby but I don't want to screw anything up just because I got drunk when I didn't know I was pregnant! I took a test today and it said positive but I know those things aren't always right and I just want to know for sure if it could hurt the baby if it was right because it would kill Jasper."

"Calm down, Alice." I said as I wrapped her into a hug. "Everything would be fine if you are early in the pregnancy. How far along do you think you are?"

"No more than six weeks."

"It should be fine, Alice. Just go to your doctor as soon as possible and find out for sure."

"Thank you, Edward. Please don't tell anyone though, I don't want to get Jasper's hopes up if I'm not really pregnant."

"Your secret is safe with me."

* * *

**AN: Sorry for the late late late update. I had major writer's block and I kept telling myself I'd try again later but later ended up as days later.**


	12. You've got a Friend in Me

**EPOV**

I was woken up by the loud and annoying sound of someone pounding on my door. I had only had two visitors to my apartment since I moved in; Emmett and the Tai food delivery for Bella.

"Hold on, I'm coming!"

"Hurry up and open the damn door Edward! We're going to be late."

"Alice?" I asked as I opened the door.

"Good morning sleepy head."

"What are you doing here? And what are we going to be late for?"

"Well I know it's really not my place to ask but you are my brother and you're the only one who knows about any of this so I was kind of wondering if you would come to the doctor's office with me today. I called last night after you left to set up an appointment and like I said I don't want to get Jasper's hopes up and Bella and Rose don't know about any of this… so I thought maybe you could come. This isn't really something I want to do alone, whatever the outcome."

"I would be glad to come with you, Alice. I'm your brother; I'm here whenever you need me."

"This means a lot to me Edward, thank you." She said as she pulled me into a hug.

"Just let me get changed and we can head out. We can take my car if you'd like."

Thirty minutes later we were sitting in the waiting room of the family clinic. We were a few minutes early for Alice's appointment so we were waiting for the doctor to call her name.

"You know… the last time I was in here was with Bella. It was a few months after you left, actually. Bella might kill me for telling you this, but she had a pregnancy scare after you left. She stopped taking the pill after you left because she got the flu. She decided after the flu was gone that she didn't need the pill because she swore she was never going to love again. After she stopped taking the pill, she was late. At first she figured it was because she stopped taking the pill but then it still never came. She started freaking out thinking that if she was pregnant, you would think it was all some plan to get you to come home. When she first told me about it all, in a way I hoped she was. I wanted more than anything to see my best friend happy again, and I knew that you being back would be the only thing that would be able to make her happy again. She eventually tried to be happy for everyone, but I could tell she wasn't _really _happy. Anyways, as much as I wanted to see bronze haired, accident prone children running around, it turned out to be a false alarm. I guess it was the stress of everything happening around her that it caused her body to stress out too. It was after that when she finally started being almost normal again."

"Mrs. Whitlock, the doctor will see you now."

"Are you sure you want me to come in the room with you? I could wait out here if you want me to."

"Don't be crazy Edward; I want you in there with me. If I can't have Jasper, you'll have to do."

"Gee, thanks Alice; I love you too."

**XXXXXXX**

An hour and a half later, we were back in the waiting room. The doctor had taken some blood and asked Alice some questions and now all we could do was wait for the results.

"About what you told me before…what do you think Bella would have done if it wasn't just a scare?"

"Honestly, I don't know. She never would have given it up since it would be like having a part of you with her everyday, but I don't think she would have told you about it. At least not on her own free will. Mom and dad would have called you, and if they didn't I would have. The more important question though is what would _you_ have done if it wasn't just a scare?"

"When I first left, I was just as bad off as Bella was. I didn't know the full extent to how badly I hurt her because I would delete any emails that mentioned her. If I had of known, I probably would have dropped everything and came back. At that point, I didn't think I deserved her anymore but I still would have come back. It wouldn't have taken a pregnancy to get me back if I knew what was going on with her."

We sat in silence for a few minutes before the nurse came back in. "Mrs. Whitlock, the doctor has your blood test results."

I stood up and took Alice's hand. "Are you read for this, sis?"

"It's now or never," She said as she stood up. "I guess soon is better than later in this situation."

We walked into the same room we had been in before and waited for the doctor to come in.

"We have your test results back and according to them, you are about 7 weeks pregnant. Congratulations, Mrs. Whitlock."

I turned to Alice and saw the tears in her eyes and I could tell from the smile on her face that they were tears of pure joy. "Congratulations, Alice. You and Jasper deserve to be happy."

She wrapped her arms around my neck as tightly as they could go and I could feel her smiling into my shoulder. "Thank you Edward, for being here with me."

"It was my pleasure. Now let's get you home; you have a husband to celebrate with."

"I will call you later this week with some recommendations of an OB/GYN in your area so you can set up an appointment. If you stop by the nurse's desk on your way out she can give you some pre-natal vitamins to last until you make another appointment."

"Thank you, Dr. Rowland."

The smile never left Alice's face the entire time I drove her back to see Jasper.

* * *

**AN: Kind of a filler chapter but it's to show that the brother/sister bond between Alice and Edward is still strong.**


	13. Mix Tape

**BPOV**

I spent the entire afternoon re-reading Wuthering Heights for about the hundredth time. I heard my phone ring a few times but I was too engulfed in the novel to answer it.

When I heard a knock on the door I was planning on just waiting for them to leave. After a few minutes of their constant knocking, I heard silence and hoped they went away. I heard my phone ring once again, but I didn't recognize the number. I debated on whether or not I should pick up the call, but before I could decide it stopped ringing. As soon as it stopped ringing, the knocking started again.

I knew it couldn't be Alice or Rose; they both had spare keys to my apartment.

I slowly tip-toed over to the door to peek out the peep hole.

"I've been ordered not to leave here until I get a hold of you somehow. Open the door Bella!"

I stood on my tippy toes to see as much out the peep hole as I could. Was that… Edward?

"Edward? Is that you?"

"Bella! I'm not allowed to leave until I make contact with you so would you please just open the door?"

I opened the door to see him standing there with a bored look on his face.

"This is the third day in a row that you appeared at my doorway and two out of the three were unplanned. You've been here more this weekend than Emmett and Jasper have all month."

"You haven't been picking up your phone all day so Rose and Alice are freaking out. They called me to see if I was with you and when I told them I wasn't I got sent on a Bella hunt."

"I was reading Wuthering Heights and I didn't want to be interrupted. I was too into the book to get the phone. I wasn't even going to answer the door but I thought you were some creepy stalker."

"So you went to the door because you thought I was a creepy stalker? Did it not occur to you to hide?"

"Nope."

"Didn't you read that book at least 50 times in high school? Doesn't it get old after awhile?"

"Yeah, and about 50 more after high school." I said with a smile. "It's a classic story; I could never get bored with it."

"Well I'm sorry for interrupting you, but Alice has some news."

"Is she alright? Is Jasper alright? Or is it Rose? Or Emmett? Why didn't she just tell me her-"

"Calm down, everyone is perfectly fine." He said, cutting me off.

"What is it then?"

"I swore to Alice that I wouldn't tell you. She wants to tell you herself tonight at-"

"So you know what it is? Come on Edward, you can tell me. I promise I won't tell Alice you told me!" I tried giving him the puppy dog eyes but he immediately closed his eyes and covered his ears.

"No begging! I promised Alice I wouldn't tell you and I can't deny you anything when you pull that stupid face!"

"Fine, I won't beg you. I'll just sit around and over-analyze what it could be, essentially driving myself insane with all my worrying about what it could possibly be." I said in a sad tone.

He slowly opened his eyes and raised his eyebrows at me. "Not working, Bella."

"Well since you won't tell me, when do I get to find out?"

"Tonight. Alice is having dinner at her place and she will tell everyone the news then."

"Why are you so special to get to know the news before everyone else? Does Jasper know what it is?"

"I get to know because I am her brother and she needed my help with it. No, Jasper doesn't know yet. She wants everyone to find out at the same time."

"Everyone except for you to find out at the same time. Come on Edward, you know you want to tell me!"

"Oh look!" He said pointing to the T.V. "The Office is on!"

"Nice subject change, but don't think it's going to get you out of telling me what-" I paused while I glanced over at the T.V to see which episode was on. "Oh my gosh, it's the beach games episode! I love this one!"

I ran and sat down on the couch, grabbing the remote so I could turn it up. I looked back at Edward and saw him standing awkwardly at the door.

"Umm okay, well Alice says just to be there-"

"No talking until commercials! Just come sit down and we can talk details on the next commercial break."

As we watched The Office, I kept noticed Edward stop watching the T.V to stare at me. Sometimes I would look over and catch him staring and he would give me that damn crooked smile.

By the end of the episode we had discussed Alice's dinner (over commercials, of course) and he had offered to drive me there since we both live in the same building.

"Okay, so I'll be back at seven to pick you up."

"Why don't we just meet in the lobby at seven?"

"I'll be coming down in the elevator anyways, so it won't take much time to just stop at your floor."

"Sure. Have a, uh, safe trip back up two floors."

**XXXXXXX**

It was 5:30 when he left, so I had an hour and a half to pick an outfit, get showered and get ready to go. I had no clue what to wear since I didn't know what the dinner was for, but I finally decided on a pair of jeans and a dark blue long sleeved top, both of which I got while shopping with Alice and Rose.

I was ready ten minutes before Edward got there, but when he knocked on the door my stomach immediately filled with butterflies.

_What are you doing? It's not like this is a date!_

I tried calming myself down as I walked to the door but it didn't seem to be working.

"Good evening," He said as I opened the door. "You look amazing, as usual."

"Thank you," I said, blushing. "You look very handsome yourself."

"Thanks. We should get going; Alice will kill us if we're late."

"So are you really not going to tell me what the surprise is? You know I don't like surprises! And I don't like being the last to know things either so _please_ tell me?" I asked as we stepped into the elevator.

"You're not going to be the last to know. Rose, Jasper and Emmett don't know and since you're finding out at the same time as they are, none of you will be the last to know."

"Or since someone already does know, that means that all of us will be the last to know which makes me the last to know in association and I just told you that I hate to be the last to know."

"That doesn't even make any sense, Bella. I see your mind is still the same as it was seven years ago."

"Maybe not, but it has been crazy enough to think up enough thoughts to write almost a full book. I just need a few more chapters and I can send it to some editors."

"You've almost written an entire book? Bella, that's awesome!"

"It's hardly awesome. It still needs a bunch of work done to it even if there are only a few chapters left to be written."

"I'd love to read it sometime."

"Oh no no no no! No one is reading it until after I have found an editor and have it 100 percent finished."

"Oh come on, I bet it's amazing!"

"I'll let you read it if you tell me what Alice's secret is."

"That's not fair! I'm not allowed to tell you."

"Well then no novel for you." I said, batting my eyelashes.

When we got to his car, he opened the car door for me to get in. "Always the gentleman."

"My momma raised me right." I could help but laugh at his fake 'ghetto' impression.

The first few minutes of the car ride was completely silent, but surprisingly not awkward.

"There are some CD's in the glove compartment. You can choose one to listen to if you want."

I started looking through the CD's he had when I came across one labeled 'Bella's Mix'

"What's this one?" I asked holding it up so he could see it.

"Um no that's just… something that I… let's not listen to that one." He tried grabbing the CD from my hands but I moved it away before he could get it.

"Ahh, no. I think we should listen to this one. Unless of course, you want to tell me Alice's surprise and in that case I would give you the CD."

"It's just… a mix CD of songs that… I found while I was in Italy. Just… don't worry about it."

"Why is it called Bella's Mix?"

"They are…sort of all songs that reminded me of you. Now can you just please put it back?"

"What songs are on it?"

"That's not really important." He said, trying again to grab the CD from me.

"Hey, I said Alice's secret or no CD. I haven't heard her secret and I haven't heard the CD so which one is it gonna be?"

"If you look behind all of the other CD's there should be a case and a list of all the songs on there. If you promise not to look at what songs are on there until after I'm out of your sight."

"Deal. But does this mean no secret?"

"Just be happy you get the CD."

"Oh, I am." I said as I looked over and smiled at him. He rested his head on the back of his seat as we pulled into Alice's drive way, giving me his signature crooked grin that made me melt into my seat.

* * *

**AN: Okay, super sorry for the delay. I read Breaking Dawn (and loved it) and then I got addicted to The Office (hence why it's mentioned) so I have been watching that non stop.**


	14. If I Could Turn Back Time

**EPOV**

It was nice riding with Bella. It was quiet, but not in an awkward way. I hadn't seen her in seven years, but I still felt like I knew everything about her.

I wasn't planning on giving Bella the mix CD I made. I had made it the year after I left, and I was going to give it to her on my trip that I had planned to visit home. Since I didn't end up going on the trip, I didn't ever give her the CD. I had to have listened to it over 1000 times, but none of the songs ever got old because they all reminded me of Bella. As soon as she pulled out the CD I had made for her, I cursed myself for not taking it into my new apartment like I had planned. When I looked over at the CD in her hands, I was immediately reminded of when I made it for her.__

--Flashback--

It had been two weeks since I finally decided to fly back and visit Forks. In those two weeks I had changed my mind countless times about whether or not I would actually go, and now it was the night before my plane would be taking off.

I felt bad about leaving everybody a year ago, but I knew it was the best thing for my career. It was going to be hard to see my family again after so long, but I knew that nothing would be as hard as seeing Bella again. I would dream of her every night, and her beautiful face was constantly in my mind.

I didn't know what I was going to say to my family when I got back home. The only person who had known I was leaving was Emmett, and I had made him promise not to tell a living soul. Even after I was gone, he probably never told anyone that he knew for fear of them blaming him for letting me leave. He had tried to convince me to stay, but in the end he gave up; I had convinced myself that I didn't deserve Bella, and that she would be better off without me.

As I lay in bed that night, I started thinking about what I would say to Bella when, or if, I saw her again. There weren't enough words in the dictionary to tell her how much I still love her, and miss her. I tried to come up with possible things I could say to her, but everything I tried to put together sounded so cheesy and generic. I don't know how long I had laid in bed for, but soon I found myself turning on my computer to make her a mix CD.

If I couldn't find the right words to tell her how I felt, I would find some people who could. I had a 'Bella' play list on my computer filled with songs that reminded me of Bella and I immediately started going through them to pick which ones would go on the CD. It was 5am by the time I finished picking the perfect songs and finding just the right cover design. My plane was taking off at noon, so I spent the next few hours sleeping while listening to Bella's Mix.

--

I had set my alarm for 9am so I could still have time for last minute packing before I set off for the airport. When I finally had everything packed and ready to go, I made the short trip to the airport. I had about half an hour before my plane would be taking off, so I just sat and waited for time to pass.

The mix CD I had made for Bella felt like it was burning a hole through my jacket pocket. I felt like such a girl. My stomach was actually hurting from my nerves, and it felt like it was infested with tiny bugs crawling around inside of my stomach; I had never been this nervous before.

Before I knew it, my flight was being called over the PA system. It was the final boarding call and I made my way to gates as quickly as possible. Just as I was about to hand over my boarding pass, I looked back and had to do a double take.

'No,' I told myself, 'that can't be her.'

I couldn't look away. It was probably just a coincidence, but the girl standing 100 feet away from me looked exactly like Bella had. She had long brown hair and deep chocolaty eyes that were full of sadness.

I could hear the man asking me for my plane ticket, but I couldn't bring myself to turn around. People from behind me started pushing forward, but I was stuck exactly where I was.

I don't know how long I stood there staring at the girl, but she was soon turning towards me. When she saw me looking at her, a look of horror crossed her face. I must have really creeped her out, and I used all I had to force myself to look away.

I grabbed my bags from the floor beside me and left the airport as fast as my legs could take me.

--End Flashback--

* * *

**AN: Wow. Long freaking time no update. Up until the end of the summer, my internet was totally whack, my ms word died on me and now school has started up again and I got a job so I don't know how frequent updates are going to be. I'll aim for once a week though.**


	15. You're Having My Baby

**BPOV**

When we got inside the house, everyone was sitting around in the living room waiting for us. Emmett started screaming the minute we walked in the door.

"FINALLY! Geeze guys, I've been waiting all day to know what this damn secret is."

"Calm down, Emmett. You're all going to find out after dinner."

"Alice honey, can't you _please_ tell us now?"

"Just wait Jasper. The surprise is all set up in the dining room and you'll all see it once the food is ready. There's a reason you weren't allowed in the dining room all day."

"So you mean, it's all set up, and if we just happened to mistakenly go into the dining room thinking it was say, the bathroom, we would see the surprise and there would be nothing you could do about it?"

"No, Emmett. If that were to happen, whoever 'accidentally' went into the dining room would be yelled at, possibly slapped and would not be named god parent of my child. "

"What child, Alice? We don't…we don't have a child. Do we?"

Alice's face went blank, not realizing what she had just said. "Oh shit." She muttered to herself.

"Shouldn't you know if you have a kid, dumbass? God I clearly got the brains in this family."

"Shut up, Rose. Alice, what are you talking about?"

"Shit, this wasn't how I was supposed to tell you guys. I went to the doctors and they told me that.."

"SHUT UP! YOU'RE PREGNANT?"

"God Rose, I can't even tell my own secret!?"

"Seriously? I mean, we're actually going to have a baby?" Jasper asked as he started walking towards Alice.

"Again with the stupid questions. Jasper, when a woman gets pregnant, generally a baby comes nine months after that. Didn't mom and dad talk to you about the birds and the bees?"

"Shut up, Rose! We're really having a baby!?"

"Yes." Jasper pulled Alice into a hug and began spinning her around. When he finally put her down, he continued to hug her until Emmet joined in on the hug, then Rose, eventually making it one big congratulatory group hug.

"I'm so happy for you Alice! That baby is going to be spoiled so much by all of us! Ooh, how far along are you? When you do find out if it's a boy or a girl?" Emmet asked, sounding more like a girl than Rose.

"Calm down, Emmet. I won't be finding out from the doctors at all. I already know it's going to be a little girl, I can just feel it."

Well all continued to congratulate Alice and Jasper, asking any questions we thought of. We eventually moved into the dining room, where it was fully decorated with "Congratulations, It's a girl!" signs everywhere and many, many pink balloons.

I was truly happy for my best friend. She already had her perfect husband, and she'd soon have her perfect family too.

But when would it be my turn?

**Sorry it took WAY TOO LONG for an update.. like over a year? I might keep adding random updates, but I make no promises for how often they will come. This was just a short chapter to get back into the story. Real E/B drama shall come later ;)**


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